I never got to have that conversation. I lost my mother just as I became a teen. In her place were the most loving and caring Grandparents (parents) any kid could wish for Both in their late 60s, they took on a lot of responsibility. I did my best to be appreciative and stay out of trouble. There was mutual respect and love.
Near as my grandmother ever came to seeing my crossdressing self was a dress rehearsal for a womanless beauty pageant. My then girlfriend did the full deal, makeup, heels and her prom dress. There was a sense I felt that bordered on something just short of "whatever". It was never discussed later.
Any of you that may have had the above type discussion were fortunate. So many times I wish I had had the opportunity for full disclosure. Like going back in time, altering the past may have change everything in the future. So, I am Ok with the way my life progressed. Although my biggest regret is not bein more honest. First, with myself and with family. Many lost opportunities and a lot of concealing.
How abut you? Did you have an open discussion with your mother as a youth or adult? What reactions? We all share such similar events / experiences in our lives. Please tell us your experience.
From what I can tell I'm a bit older than you and when I grew up what I was at a minimum almost unheard of and lots of shame connected with it.things have really changed now. but in retrospect I feel my Mom would have been ok with it if I had overcome my fear etc. however if my Dad got wind of it he would have gone haywire.
ReplyDeleteps-like you (I assume) that girl has been with me since day one which is why I get a charge out of the stories on Fictionmania etc where the main character suddenly discovers that he wants to be a girl-EMILY
Rhonda, When I was an adolescent, I was too confused and scared to speak to my parents about my inner girl. In retrospect, I think they both would have been understanding, so I think of my reluctance as a missed opportunity. Of course, it wouldn't be until many years later when I would come to understand my trans nature, so maybe having a conversation with my mom or dad back then would have been premature. Still, I am always curious to know how that talk might have gone.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Sally
I also lost my mom when I was 17. It was the mid60’s. Things like that were unheard of. When I was about 13 my mom got a pair of pj’s for a birthday gift. She was embarrassed to exchange for a larger size. Gave them to me. Not cotton or flannel but rayon. I wish I would have pursued it further. Never know now what it may have led to. I read fiction mania wishing I could have been me too.
ReplyDeleteI am a big fiction mania fan as well. I love the stories where the son becomes a girl with the help of his mom. Sometimes willingly and sometimes with just the right encouragement. "Caught with consequences".
ReplyDeleteI came out to my mom and my sisters and a few other members of my family (but not my father), in my 40s. They have all been supportive, and probably would have been supportive even earlier. I was just too shy and embarrassed to come out to them earlier. Probably missed a lot of opportunities, but I have had some lovely times since then, with shopping outings, getting nails done, etc.
ReplyDelete