How did it all begin? Sister? Mother? Girlfriend? Wife? Fill in the blank in the title.
We all had our starting place. The " AH-HA" moment; this feels good moment. I like the way this item seems to mesh with the way I feel about myself.
I did not have a sister so migrated to my mother's dresses and shoes. She passed not long after my 12th birthday so her clothier never quite fit me the way I wanted. First I was too large and then too small. Her shoes were my best option and pleasure. She loved shoes, heels especially. They did fit especially as I got older. I would sneak moments and I learned to walk in her heels early on.
Highschool and the girlfriends became my objects of desire. Girl watching was a favorite pastime that has never gone away. One of my girlfriends left a bra in my car after a heavy petting session and this was a treasure for many years to come. I lied and never owned up to finding it.
Today all of my clothes are "MY" clothes. I purchase styes I like and are me. If truth be told about 99% of my clothes are female cut/style. (jeans, tops, sneakers)
If they were just androgynous in nature there would be more questioning looks or queries. To the contrary, I am almost universally ma'amed. And. even when not addressed as a female, I sense either a flirtatious nature or friendly gesture. i.e. Door being opened for me or asked if I like/recommend something. Very much not a typical male-to-male conversations. I believe it is the long white hair (ponytail) that may be providing an older "woman" less threatening visual.
So who provided your starter feminine differential? Who today is your source and provider of feminine clothing? Who is your role model?
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I had an older sister, but my first items were my mother's. My sister's things were mostly too small for me, whereas my mother's would fit me better, especially her heels. I did eventually outgrow both, so I started buying my own clothes and shoes while in college.
ReplyDeleteI buy all of my female things from a couple of online stores and thrift shops. I've slowed down my purchasing as I don't have more room and my time for outings is quite limited.
Excellent topic, Rhonda!
Mom's closet was my fascination - I was SO bummed when I outgrew her shoes. I'm sure she knew what was up, but she never forced the issue. I still have some of her clip-on earrings - and they are fabulous! -Juliet
ReplyDeleteI loved my mother's "Screw on" earrings. I kept those for years.
DeleteI too, started in my mom's closet. For the lonest time, her shoes fit me, but eventually I had to find a different footwear source. My source for clothing is still department stores; it's amazing what great delas you can find on the discount racks. My role models are those women who haven't lost their affinity for classically feminine lines.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Sally
I wouldn't have dared get into my parent's room. I couldn't risk my father finding out! My oldest sister was just a little younger than me and her clothes fit pretty well until my late teens (I don't think she ever knew). I was also occasionally able to find a few items from piles of clothes passed around from one family to another. From late teens on everything has been my own purchases.
ReplyDeletePantyhose were my initial feminine clothing infatuation, and since i don't have any sisters, mom's drawer was the place I first explored to fulfill that desire. Every one in a while I would try on some of her clothes, but mom wasn't nearly as fashionable as the young women I envied.
ReplyDeleteI was fortunate to be able to choose from my two older sisters’ and my mothers’ dresser drawers and closets full of feminine finery in the late 1950's. The selections before me were almost limitless, my only restriction was finding enough alone-time in our house to don these soft and feminine garments. When I knew everyone would be out for a long period of time, I would slip into their rooms, pick out some lingerie from their drawers, head into their walk-in closets, and slip into lots of different, slinky, soft clothing items.
ReplyDeleteI’m not sure if I would be as tempted to do this if I were growing up today, as the typical female everyday wardrobe of 2025 is not that radically different from a male wardrobe - slacks, wool or cotton socks, low heel or no heel shoes, courser fabrics overall, shirts instead of billowy blouses, etc. Of course most women do own some softer more feminine ‘girly’ clothing, but that seems relegated to more special occasions, or if required for working in an office, or reserved for nights in the boudoir. It’s a rare sight to see my favorite girly-girl item on any female today, sheer sensuous stockings. To me the bare leg look just isn’t as special. ’Tis a shame that sensuous slips and the like have mostly slipped away.
Anyway, I was a lucky child who loved female attire and had many amazing selections for my occasional forays into dressing like a girl. I tried on every girly concoction I could, and admired the view of myself in a full-length mirror, not only while wearing the wondrous lingerie - ruffled lace trimmed satin panties, long-line bras trimmed with lace, satiny girdles, garter belts, sheer stockings, slips, petticoats - but eventually if time allowed, I also donned their high heels, dresses, skirts, blouses, clip-on earrings, bracelets, necklaces, hair bows, pretty hats with lace and nets covering one’s face, and the like. No one in my house had wigs, so I had to make ‘do’ with my short male hair. I didn’t dare try to use makeup, because I worried about removing it completely, and understood that anything that was slightly used might be noticed. I would have loved to try the full effect of all female attire and makeup, even spraying myself with perfume, but that never happened in my youthful experiments with crossdressing at home.
Another benefit of growing up at that period of the utmost feminine finery, was the proliferation of one of my favorite girly item of all - petticoats. The fullest and pouffiest were designed to hold out the wide skirts of gowns. My sisters had two gowns each, one for Junior and one for Senior prom. They were my very favorites, chiffon and satin with long skirts, held out by layer after layer after layer of crinolines and petticoats. Wearing them was like turning yourself into a floating cloud. I couldn’t get enough of anything with a petticoat, wearing a gown or even a shorter skirt demanded that you give it a twirl, something that took some concentration when tottering on delicate shoes with thin, spiky, high heels. I don’t have any photos of those actual beautiful gowns I sometimes got to wear, but I have included photos of gowns similar to them.
In case anyone wonders if I ever got caught dressed as a girl, the answer is no, but it was close one time. I was almost done putting everything carefully back when I heard the garage door open and I had to rush. I wonder if they every noticed anything amiss, but I suspect my sisters probably thought the other sister had borrowed something and put it back. If my crossdressing escapades were ever suspected I never learned about it.