I started flying airplanes when I was 19. Once you start flying you just don’t want to ever stop. I’ve been flying a long time, but I’ve been Trans even longer. Of course, I didn’t know what I was for most of my life, actually. I think I worked it out over the last 12 or 13 years and now that I finally understand myself…mostly…I’ve become totally comfortable presenting in public. I go where I want to go, when I want to go. It is totally liberating for me…for any Trans person…to be “out among the living.”
Last evening I was out with a friend at a very nice restaurant and I caught a glimpse of two other sisters coming into the restaurant. They were both alternating between looking down as they shuffled in, unsure of their footing, and then each would look up, eyes darting from side to side, as they made their way into the restaurant’s bar area. They looked so uncomfortable and so unsure of themselves and my mind went back to the last time I had that very same feeling. I was flying left seat in mid-size turboprop under the watchful eye of my new boss who was acting as a “Check Airman” in the right seat. He was an old codger, a WWII vet, with thousands of hours under his belt. It was late in the day and we had passengers in the back who needed to get home. I taxied the airplane toward the terminal and realized that there was no one around to wave me into a parking spot. I hesitated. “Why are we slowing down?” the Old Man snorted. “Well, I’m not sure where to park this thing” I answered. He leaned forward, and out of the side of his mouth he said, “You pull up to the front door like you own the place!”
I think of that now when I enter a room. Walk in “like you own the place.” Don’t slink in like you are afraid. Act like you belong there. Because you do.
Caitlin told me this story last week when we were out at one of Palm Beach most elegant after work cocktail gatherings. Is seemed so appropriate for the evening and the blog, I ask her to write it up for all of us. Great advise. Thank you Caitlin.