Thursday, December 31, 2015

Scientific American Mind


 Transgender Kids: What Does It Take to Help Them Thrive?  Current Issue Scientific American Mind January 2016 Volume 27, Issue 1

You can click on the above link to read the fascinating article written by Francine Russo.  There are several well written case studies and a discussion on each.  I  am not sure that I agree 100% but it is better for all of us that an open debate is taking place than to just ignore the kids and the important issues.  Had we been born in this generation I am sure our lives would be different today.     


Bending Gender - Studies suggest that 0.3 percent of people in the U.S. feel strongly that their biological sex does not correspond to their gender identity. Researchers have developed a multi part transition process for young trans people that begins with careful screening, then blockers at the onset of puberty and later cross-sex hormones to allow them to undergo puberty in their affirmed gender, followed by surgery. Some parents and clinicians are pushing back against the existing guidelines, seeking a more case-by-case approach.

Some children insist, from the moment they can speak, that they are not the gender indicated by their biological sex. So where does this knowledge reside? And is it possible to discern a genetic or anatomical basis for transgender identity? Exploration of these questions is relatively new, but there is a bit of evidence for a genetic basis. Identical twins are somewhat more likely than fraternal twins to both be trans. Francine Russo



Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Leather Goods

I love leather skirts!  Keep in mind that leather and the color black will never go out of style. So these tend to be investment dressing.  Tan and brown also can go with so much form pink (shown) to black or brown matching.  No matter the style – Keep in mind that leather calls for bold.   Nothing can replace the bold fashion statement that a leather skirt sends.  It is one of your favorite dressy styles, even in Florida.  Whether you choose a mid-length leather skirt, full A-line with flowy hemline or go for a leather pencil skirt to accentuate your curves; this wardrobe item will make your look bold and adventurous.  Yes - We really need that!

 The skirt on the left I just purchased from Black Markert / White House and it is on sale. 

A skirt very similar to the one on the left was purchased from Talbots last year in both brown and black.  It is currently not on sale but if interested, it will likely will be on sale sometime over the next few months.  

All of the shoes are from either Cole Haan or Coach

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

The Danish Girl - My Review

The Danish Girl stars Eddie Redmayne as Lili Elbe, one of the first known recipients of sex reassignment surgery and Alicia Vikander as Gerda Wegener.

The movie The Danish Girl is finally out of limited release.  It is one of the most touching movies dealing with the transgender subject I have ever seen.  The early part of the movie covers the cross dressing spectrum so well I caught myself with several moment of such empathy, my breath was short.  Very early on we feel at one with Lili.   When Lili's wife order him to stop, the conversation that ensues is the conversation we have all had at one time or another.  The inevitable point of no return, we all see coming. 

The screenwriter knows us well.  There are several scenes when he fondles the cloths. There is a scene when he watches his wife unlace her shoes.  He is caught wearing a nightgown under his male day clothes.  He sneaks to a place to get dressed.  He studies the painting of himself as Lili.   

Every scene is a work of art.  Any one frame, as shown above, could stand as a gallery photograph. Scenes of Nyhavn which is a 17th-century waterfront, canal and entertainment district in Copenhagen, Denmark make me want to go there.

There is factual inaccuracies the you can read about in the Wikipedia account of the Danish Girl. But much is forgiven when the closing statement explain that Lili's life is credited as being the fore runner for what today is the “Transgender Movement”.    The movie is based on a fictional book that does not tell the true story of Einar (Lili)  and Gerda Wegener.  However awareness of some of the details of the true story only serves to enhance ones appreciation for the historical significance of what is unfolding on the screen.

Be prepared, if you attend the movie with someone, exchanges following the movie are likely to be pointed.  This is a must see movie but take a long a tissue or two.
Tell us what you think of the movie?

Lili Elbe

Monday, December 28, 2015

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) 


There was a man locked deep in a dungeon for half his lifetime.  He finally decided to free himself or be killed in the process.  He made plans to jump his jailer when he brought his food the next day.  While laying out his plans he turned the handle of his cell door only to find it was not locked. 

Upon making this discovery he fled the unguarded prison, returned to his home and lived happily ever after.

The message is that we all tend to lock ourselves up with exaggerated anxiety.  If we do not have the courage to try the door, we will remain forever in our own personal prisons. That is why this BLOG is called "Rhonda's Escape".

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Sunday Funnies 12/27

The funnies were my favorite section of the Sunday paper when I was growing up. I will make an effort to make this a regular Sunday feature.  Enjoy and have a super week!

Thanks again for being loyal readers.


Saturday, December 26, 2015

50,000 and Counting

 A milestone 50,000 views

Today something has happened which I could never possibly imagine - My blog has reached over 50,000 views.  For someone who has always struggled with writing, starting and maintaining a blog seemed unimaginable.  There are those who fear public speaking, but I always found that easy compared to writing.  I cannot tell you the number of times I have shared my writing only to hear snickering or outright laughter.  I appreciate your understanding very much.  I am a ferocious reader thus appreciate the ability to write.  Blogging has given voice to many of my stories, events, and experiences. 

I know that being transgender and having dyslexia has complicated my life.  In general dyslexics are highly creative, intuitive, excel at three-dimensional problem solving and hands-on learning. But dyslexia and being transgender has in many ways, enhanced by life.  I firmly believe that dyslexia has shaped many of my thought processes and believe dyslexia has enhanced my programming skills as to the way I view/process details.  If you are dyslexia then you know it has enhanced your life in ways also.  

Dyslexia is more than just reading and spelling. It has a self-worth component.  If you are told, enough times, you are retarded, dumb or slow, you start to believe it at some point.   Behavioral issues soon take hold.  Add transgender to that mix and it is easy to become demoralize.  However, given the right help support, and understanding, limits disappear.  Once you understand yourself and escape negativity, “it gets better” – Much better!  
Writing this blog has never been about how many views.  It is to help others escape.  Do escape the fear of self-limitation and live a full life.  If this blog has helped one person who has been going through a difficult time, then it has all been worthwhile.

Thank you, if you are a regular reader.  Your support, comments and contributions mean the world to me. We are all different, and we all see the world in a slightly different ways.  Let us embrace our diversity and live full lives.  Escape.  Thank you for your support. 


If you have not already read my
"About This Blog" and my "About Me" please do. 

Friday, December 25, 2015

Walking Round In......

 Bob Rivers - Walking Round In Women's Underwear 


 I hope everyone has had a wonderful Holiday and received all of the beautiful fashion items you wished for.  

Just in case - There is always next year.  

Start you list early..... 


Thursday, December 24, 2015

Transgender Night Before Christmas

Cross Dressing Night Before Christmas

Posted to alt.fashion.crossdressing by Shae Guerin  2002-12-23. 


'Twas the night before Christmas, and all thru the house
I was making my plans to look more like my spouse
I carefully laid out my very best clothes
My bra and my panties, my slip and my hose

My stockings weren't hung by the chimney tonite
They were on me instead, feeling sensually tight
My dress was of velvet, a burgundy red
And on my long nails a new polish was spread

With makeup and jewelry, high heels on my feet
I was looking so sexy, and feeling so sweet
When out in the yard there arose such a noise
That I sprang from my bedroom, forgetting my poise

The moon on the snow with it's brilliant white glitter
Reminds me of lace, to set my heart a-twitter
When what to my long-lashed eyes should appear
But a person in red with a sleigh and reindeer

But I couldn't tell, was it a 'he' or a 'she'
The one with the pack was dressed somewhat like me
There in the sleigh was this 'cutsey' old flirt
With a white wig and makeup, a red blouse and skirt

The reindeer were sparkling, with rhinestones and pearls
And their antlers in ribbons, so they all looked like girls
When s/he stepped from the sleigh, to my eyes were revealed
Her knee-hi black boots with their seven-inch heels

Santa just blushed, but I stood there and smiled
And said, "Hello, my dear, can you stay for awhile?"
"Well you finally caught me", he said with a pout
"At this time on Christmas, folks are seldom about."

"I don't go enfemme very ofen at home,
Mrs Clause doesn't like it, so I do it alone.
"So when I give out goodies to make others smile
"I like to feel pretty and femme for awhile."

"So I ride off dressed up, from my hi-heels to wig,
"On Christmas eve night while I'm doing my gig."
I said, "Don't worry Santa, your secret is safe
Why don't you come in and just freshen your face."

We sat and we talked and vented our passion
For feminine frills and the latest new fashions
We finally parted with a hug and a kiss
S/he said, "I must go now, or some children I'll miss"

I went to my party and had a great time
With music and laughter and good food and wine
But when I returned and looked under my tree
I found some new pretties from sweet Santa to me

Lacy panties, a bra and a soft satin blouse
Perfumes and some candles to light up my house
But it wasn't the goodies that swept away my blues
It was knowing that Santa was a cross dresser too

So next time don't judge all the people you meet
By what they are wearing when out on the street
For in being ones self, there's no 'wrong or right' 

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night! 

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Mind-Body Connection

There are many example of what we call the mind-body connection. This means that our thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and attitudes can positively or negatively affect our biological functioning. In other words, our minds can affect how healthy our bodies are!

On the other hand, what we do with our physical body (what we eat how much we exercise, even our posture) can impact our mental state (again positively or negatively). This results in a complex interrelationship between our minds and bodies.

Why is this relevant to us?  Have you noticed that when you are dressed and behaving as our other self, something changes.  That something is our mind adjusting and accepting a new reality. In my case I notice that my breathing is more relaxed,  I feel less stress in my shoulders, my hands are loose and overall I like the new me.  We all know that the mind is a receptor of the senses, processing what the eyes see, ears hear and body feels.  Some of this explains why it is so much fun. Why we keep doing it. 

Let me share an example.  I had a very good friend here in Palm Beach that dress as we do on a regular basis.  He was beautiful, had elegant gowns, and on many occasion when I went to visit, I found him in a lovely beaded cocktail dresses enjoying a drink by his pool.  His health was not good and suffered from chronic high blood pressure.  He had an electronic blood pressure measuring device and found that when dressed his pressures as well as pulse decreased.  Have we found the cure for high blood pressure?  No, but  what it tells me is that the mind body connection is very real.   

Cortisol is the stress hormone.   In survival mode, the optimal amounts of cortisol can be life saving. But when you stew on a problem, the body continuously releases cortisol, and chronic elevated levels can lead to serious issues. Too much cortisol can suppress the immune system, increase blood pressure, decrease libido, produce acne, and contribute to obesity and more.

I had a beautiful cockatiel bird that was a good companion, as I would write program code.  He would make his chirping noise and I grew accustomed to the relaxing sound while I worked.  Also I had a very nice kitty that at times was jealous of the bird and in its own way would stare at the bird as to say “you would make a nice lunch”.   Rest assured nothing bad ever happened, but I was sure that the bird sensed the danger and became very quiet.  After the cat would leave the room, the cockatiel would just shake all over as to release the stress and then be fine.  I always thought that we humans also need a way to shake off our stress and then go about the rest of the day.   

Let us see our transgender activity for what it is.  An escape from the day-to- day stresses that are thrown at us.  Do not see it as the source of the stress but see it as the release.  This requires a degree of acceptance that we must grant, knowing that we are not going to outgrow this nor get tired of doing it.  It is what it is.  Accepting being transgender and feeling good about yourself will allow us to strengthen our mind, body connection. 


Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Why Older Generations are turning towards Plastic Surgery

By: Dr. Vartan Mardirossian

The American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery reports that 84,685 people over the age of 65 had one or more cosmetic procedures in 2010. In fact, this age group has been the fastest-growing demographic of cosmetic surgery patients for several years now. Numerous things have played a factor in this trend, which doesn’t show any sign of slowing down anytime soon.  So why is the older generation turning towards Plastic Surgery?

Leading More Active Lifestyles

One of the reasons why more seniors are now seeking plastic surgery is that they are leading active lifestyles. Seniors often find themselves starting new careers or even dating in their 60s, 70s, and beyond. As such, they want to look their best in order to remain competitive. Even retired seniors who are physically active are deciding that their appearance doesn’t reflect how they feel. These individuals are choosing procedures such as liposuction and tummy tucks to provide them with a fitter, more toned, appearance, since this is not always possible with diet and exercise alone.

Safer Procedures

Advances in cosmetic surgery means that it is now possible to improve one’s appearance without undergoing extensive procedures. Even invasive surgeries such as facelifts and brow lifts use new, improved techniques that make them safer and require less downtime. Safety is always a concern whenever a senior citizen has surgery, as underlying health conditions and certain medications often prohibit people from undergoing elective procedures. The risk of complications from plastic surgery is lower than it has ever been, meaning more older adults are now able to consider it.

Reduced Stigma

Cosmetic surgery is becoming more widely accepted among all age groups. This means that a good number of seniors are no longer worried about what other people might think if they go under the knife. Many older adults have been toying with the idea for years, but felt that they would be looked down upon for having a procedure. These individuals are finally deciding to take the plunge before it’s too late, and are delighted to discover that others react to their decision in a positive manner

More Natural Results

Modern procedures also provide more natural looking results. This is important because most seniors do not wish to appear “done.” Instead, they wish to look like a younger, more vibrant version of themselves.  A number of procedures such as Botox® injections or IPL photo facials provide the type of subtle results most seniors are looking for. These procedures help take years off of an individual’s appearance gradually, so results are less startling and dramatic. As a result, those who shied away from plastic surgery because they didn’t want to appear artificial are now rethinking it.

More senior citizens than ever are considering cosmetic procedures to help them turn back the clock. As procedures continue to become safer and people become even more accepting, odds are that more and more adults over the age of 65 will choose some form of cosmetic treatment in the years to come.

Note: Vartan is my doctor, business associate, and friend

Monday, December 21, 2015


LBD - Little Black Dress

 A little black dress (LBD) is a black evening or cocktail dress, cut simply and often quite short. Fashion historians ascribe the origins of the little black dress to the 1920s designs of Coco Chanel and Jean Patou[1] intended to be long-lasting, versatile, affordable, accessible to the widest market possible and in a neutral colour. Its ubiquity is such that it is often simply referred to as the "LBD".

The "little black dress" is considered essential to a complete wardrobe by many women and fashion observers, who believe it a "rule of fashion" that every woman should own a simple, elegant black dress that can be dressed up or down depending on the occasion: for example, worn with a jacket and pumps for daytime business wear or with more ornate jewelry and accessories for evening. Because it is meant to be a staple of the wardrobe for a number of years, the style of the little black dress ideally should be as simple as possible.


 Above is my LBD.  It is Ralph Lauren jersey knit and the shoes are BCBG Ariel, which are a favorite.  In actually, I have the shoes in several colors.  I have worn my LBD to many Palm Beach events and it serves me well.  One very similar is pictured in last week's Friend's Friday.  I have a Las Vegas trip coming and just took it in to be shortened to serve as my cocktail dress for the trip.  It is about 1 1/2 inches above the knee now. 

If you do not have a "LBD" it is a worth while investment.

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Sunday Funnies 12/20


The funnies were my favorite section of the Sunday paper when I was growing up. I will make an effort to make this a regular Sunday feature.  Enjoy and have a super week!

Friends Friday 12/18

Palm Beach Cultural Council – Season’s Opening Event  

I belong to several cultural societies locally.   There I have met wonderful people and have forged long-term friendships.  The person on the right  is just such a person.  Although only a winter resident of Palm Beach, when in town we always have fun.  Wonderful restaurants, long conversations over wine, and events - A good girl friend and a good listener.  What more could you ask.  Life is good.  

The photo above was taken at a cultural event a year or so ago.  

Friend's Friday - I know a day Late

  Therefore, I would like to dedicate Fridays to you, your post and photos. 
It is not that I have run out of things to write about, but I want to make this "our place". Please feel free to comment on something I said - did not say.  if you e-mail me your post I will queue then up and post on Fridays.  Tell me about your trips.  I know you take dress-up clothes.  So what did you do?


Rhonda  - RhondaWilliams at Bellsouth.net