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Friday, June 30, 2017

Remember The Alamo - Part 2

Causal Evening in San Antonio 


Just this past week I had another business trip to San Antonio TX. See my write up from the previous trip.  

I have a love/hate relationship with this tourist mecca. I love Riverwalk. It has so much to see; places to eat and is beautiful by day and night. Likely one of the best sidewalk cafe locations, anywhere. I was there on this trip three nights and had dinner overlooking the canal/river all evenings. While eating, tourist boats loaded with people came by waving. My dinners ranged from Italian to regional fare. Some of the best Tex-Mex to be found.

My first evening, there was still some light and after eating I walked a short half block over to the historic Alamo site. This is sacred ground for Texans and for the American march west. 

Famous American like Davy Crockett, James Bowie, William Travis and in total 212 lost their lives during the Mexican General Sana Anna's 13 day siege. He overran the Alamo during the last fierce battle, occurring March 6, 1836. After the battle Santa Anna ordered the immediate execution of all survivors.

The story continues in that the Texans did not give up. Infuriated by what they thought was Santa Anna's overwhelming cruelty during the Battle of the Alamo, other settlers and adventurers were soon inspired by thoughts of revenge and joined the Texas Army. The regrouped and stronger Texas Army, many of them shouting “Remember the Alamo!" defeated the Mexican Army at the Battle of San Jacinto on April 21, 1836. This final defeat led to the end of the Texas Revolution with Mexico surrendering Texas to the United States.

I love the history and courageous account of how about 200 farmers, explorers, and ranchers held off an army of about 1500 regular Mexican soldiers for 12 days. They never surrendered. 

What has happened is that the City of San Antonio has surrender this sacred space to 3D rides, "Ripple's Believe it of Not" attractions and street traffic. I hope someday, it will become again the historic and sacred place that it is. 


"Remember The Alamo!"

Below are some photos from my stay.   





   My San Antonio Riverwalk Visit 2017





Thursday, June 29, 2017

Fashion Versatility


This is last season's popular stripes with a this season's update style, "off-the-shoulder". I am personally mixed on "off-the-shoulder". It does accentuate my larger than typical feminine shoulders but shows off my tan and has a super feminine look. What is a girl to do?  Here it is, from Lord & Taylor 

While shopping recently I tried on this Lauren top and noticed it has enough elastic in the arm to be worn both ways. When I got home I played with several of my other "off-the-should" tops and noticed that they can be worn either way as the top above - Versatility. 


Soft Surrounding Underwire T
One other nice top that I purchased last season was the Soft Surrounding "Underwire T".  What a great fit. This year they do not have it in stripe but it is still available in solids. I have worn it with my regular bra for that something extra look or as it was intended. Very flattering is how Soft Surrounding describes it. Wearing it off the shoulder is great because there are no bra straps to deal with - Underwire and shaping built it.   

Soft Surrounding has their own blog post on this item.  From Soft Spoken:
First let’s talk versatility! Our Underwire Tee comes in three different styles: tank, ¾ sleeve, and tee. This basic tee features our 2 cloud rating of “heavenly soft” and comes in over 12 different hues. Perfect for a woman of any size, we have innovated our underwire tee to gently lift and sculpt while accenting a slim fit. Best of all, this women’s shirt is sized by bra size so no need to fear for the well-endowed! The Underwire Tee is a great option to pair with a stunning bottom. Simple enough to let your other pieces shine, but just daring enough to stand out.  


A fun touch.  Be bold - Escape   





Tuesday, June 27, 2017

The Ultimate Feminine Shoe

Does any one else remember these shoes from the '78 movie Grease. Olivia Newton-John playing the character "Bad Sandy" at the end of the move walked, danced and sing wearing these. They quickly became the must have fashion shoe of the year. Known at the time as simply "Candie's".

AKA mules (french word for a backless shoe), slides, disco slides, clogs and the Barbie stiletto mule. You will also see them at times as a sexy high heeled, feather front bedroom slipper. Think Jean Harlow in her silver screen boudoir, silk nightgown, and sexy slipper. Also as a no-heel (ugly) men's bedroom slipper. 

These shoes came to mind because I was at my local shoe repair shop Saturday. For sale the shop had two pair of  3" slides very much like the one below. While I waited, I looked - yes my size.  

Now this was not my first time lusting after this style. They scream elegance and I do occasionally see them out in the wild. In fact, just a few days earlier, I saw a stylish mid-age woman wearing a very similar pair with maybe 2 1/2" heels; the place, Home Depot.  I admired her style and ability to navigate the hardware isles. 

So, sitting, I slipped one foot first into the white pair. Oh, did they make my legs and feet look good. The next shoe went on with equal beauty. Not wanting to break the spell, I crossed my legs, very lady like, and watched as one of the shoes just dangled from my toes.  Sexy!

Let me digress, I am good in heels - 3" is an all day comfort zone and I can still manage 4" heels for short car to restaurant walks and bathroom trips. Heels feel so sexy and I understand the feminine attraction. I get it.

Agent Provocateur Satin Mules
However, as I stood in the high heel slides, the lack of any support immediately became evident. Yes the first step took me right out of the shoes. Now bear-foot, I was looking back at the shoes behind me, wondering what just happened?           

OK ladies, I am open to suggestion? Is this one of those feminine secrets that is only known in the female world? Or maybe a special genetic bone structure that I did not get at birth? 

To save me for further embarrassment, my repaired heels arrived and I placed the slides back on the shelf. Maybe I will try the ultimate feminine shoe again on another day.    


  


In the 1930's Jean Harlow was one of the most photographed actresses. Her most notable film for boudoir inspiration is 1933’s "Dinner at Eight". In the film we see Jean lounging around on her bed, surrounded by over sized pillows, wearing the most fabulous slinky sequined robe with ostrich feathers and yes note the mule slippers. 
 Source: Lingerie Addict 



























Monday, June 26, 2017

Modeling - Will Work for Food

Modeling 1989
This morning I read an article in the Guardian that asked "Where are all the 50-something models?"  Good question. The conclusion is that, “We do need to see more diversity, more wrinkles, more curves, more black models..." My request - and transgender women of age. 

I had a brush with modeling in the last century. Wow, does that me sound old or what? However, I digress. I had just finished a long-term consulting gig in San Diego and was back home in Florida, completely travel weary. My youngest daughter at that time was 6 and absolutely adorable. Photogenic; an understatement. She love to pose and the camera loved her. I cannot imagine where she got that?

We rented a studio for an afternoon, with lights and shot many rolls of film (remember those). We used many change of outfits and had a great fun afternoon. The photos were good. Our next step was looking for an modeling agency and we found one; a local talent agency that was owned and operated by a larger than life beauty contest winner and former fashion model. 

She liked my daughter’s portfolio and we struck a deal. At the time West Palm Beach was not a hot bed of catalog work so there were many trips to Miami just to audition. Much of the Miami work was Latin/South American so my little blond daughter was a little out of place. It was hard on a six year old to hear she was not right of the work, so after a good number of rejections our enthusiasm waned. Still a nice memory for her.  

Digital photography was just getting started, however the electronic storage and photo enhancing was really getting going. I volunteered my services as a computer consultant and did do some computer setup work with the modeling agency. What an awful place to hang out - NOT. The owner of the agency did have a beautiful studio, so it was not long before Rhonda had her own private makeup session and photo shoot. The Photo above is from 1989.  It was just for fun.  

Fast forward - In case there are any talent agents out there that are looking for a "mature" transgender model, below is my modeling card from 2013.  Will work for .......

  




Sunday, June 25, 2017

This Week In Politics - 6/25


















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Today Sunday, June 25, I will be in San Antonio (Riverwalk Area) and there through Monday evening on business. Tuesday evening I will be in Austin.     

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Thursday, June 22, 2017

The End Of Gender

Source: FourLetterWordCards
ETSY.COM
I have always seen androgyny as defining a state of dress or appearance; a fashion statement that blends both male and female and masking what would be the obvious. It etymology has roots that go to the fusing of male-female. However, I believe its common use today relates more to fashion than social. 

Non-binary - is a much newer phrase that seems to be emerging that cuts past the fashion aspect (androgyny) and goes to the fundamentals of gender identity. Thank you Stanna for linking us to the article “Is Trans Over”.

According to Dictionary.com, “Trans-“ is a prefix occurring in loanwords from Latin ( transcend; transfix); on this model, used with the meanings “across,” “beyond,” “through,” “changing thoroughly,” “transverse,” in combination with elements of any origin.

Thus in accepting the proper definition, “Transgender” denotes crossing/moving from one gender to another. Being male and presenting as female - Being female and having surgeries to bring your body into congruence with your male mental perception. Vice versa, certainly applies.    

Non-binary describes a gender identity, which does not fit the male and female binary. Thus transcending male and female identities; not crossing or moving from either. Separate and different from transgender. Although space under the transgender umbrella is available, I am not sure that transgender is how non-binary individuals see themselves.   

Riki Wilchins in the Advocate article concluded with this statement:  


… What comes next, what takes its place, is going to be very interesting. We are unconsciously and finally treading toward the end of gender. In my opinion, that step is long overdue.

Maybe transgender it was only a resting point in our human social evolution. I see myself as a transgender person and I am happy to find this confront point. Riki's article is an interesting concept to consider. 



Breaking News according to CNN: Oregon is now the first state to offer a third gender option on state IDs. It's for people who don't want to choose male or female. An X for "not specified,"

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Football Power

This news story is remarkable.  The National Football League (NFL), has taken a stand in support of something other than greed, and its own self interest. As difficult as it is to watch 275 pound men run at top speed into each other it is like a car accident on the freeway.  You cannot help yourself, and look.

Bad press has abounded for the NFL and much like the the Tobacco companies of yesteryear swearing that smoking was good for you, the NFL has all but said about concussion; what concussions.
     
Maybe in its own self interest a kinder and gentler(right) NFL took a stand for the fans this past week against the "discrimination is OK" state bills to limit transgender person from using the bathroom that represent their gender. Here is what was reported by Mike Freeman in the Bleacher Report.


"We firmly believe that discriminatory laws such as (North Carolina) HB 2 are bad for our employees, bad for our fans and bad for business," 49ers owner Jed York said in 2016. "We believe that HB 2 will make it far more challenging for businesses across the state to recruit and retain the nation's best and brightest workers and attract the most talented students from across the country. It will also diminish the state's draw as a destination for sporting events, tourism and conventions, and new business activity.
"
The NFL also is fighting another such law, this time in Texas, by issuing what was almost a thinly veiled threat.


"The NFL embraces inclusiveness," spokesman Brian McCarthy said in response to a Houston Chronicle email question on the bill. "We want all fans to feel welcomed at our events, and NFL policies prohibit discrimination based on age, gender, race, religion, sexual orientation, or any other improper standard."
I've been told, and McCarthy intimated to the Chronicle, that the NFL is prepared to withhold any future Super Bowls from being played in the state.

The NFL - We do appreciate the support. Thank you - That took balls. 



Monday, June 19, 2017

The Feminine Differential - Spotty Science

There is much to be studied in human physiology. I love to contrast the gender differences. The gender differential I call it. The differences run historically deep. 

Here is one differential that goes back into our early human development - hunting and gathering.

The male developed into the hunter because of greater size and stamina; critical traits need for the hunt - strength to subdue. The mission would be finding, stalking, killing and bring prey back to share. The females would provide through the gathering process, which would require determining if something was eatable. If the hunt did not go well, there was a backup plan. 

Today there is no need to hunt our food however, this basic instincts has survived. We need look no further than the mall to see it in play. If a man needs something at the mall it is a hunting process. Get in, find it, purchase (kill it), get out. The gathering instinct explains why women can spend hours looking for just the right shoe, or skirt to go with a top you already have.   


Which are you a hunter or a gatherer?


Here is one more:  I love polka dots and colorful floral patterns. That is one glaring feminine preference that I enjoy. Whether it be a polka dot skirt, or spring floral dress I am drawn to it. 

Take a look at the two holiday boxes. Which one would you assume to be the female gift?  There is a whole book that deals with marketing strategies aimed at the feminine differential entitled "Why Men Like Straight Lines and Women Like Polka Dots?"   


Here is  a snippet from the above mentioned book by Gloria Moss: 

Studies have shown that men use little embellishment when making art. Woman prefer to produce round shapes with lots color that display an attention to detail. Storefront displays and the elaborate packaging in cosmetics proves this point well. Men apparently have better visual rotation skills and targeting accuracy. There's a physical basis for the difference. Men's eyes are 5 mm farther apart than women's. To compensate visually, though it's unproven, 50 percent of women may have a fourth color pigment to men’s three. This gives ladies graphical access to more than a million other colors that men can't see.

These visual differences link directly back to the hunter/gatherer roles of humans in the early days. Men had to adapt to hunting and their 3-D vision, coupled with a more limited color spectrum aided in seeing through camouflage guaranteed more accurate targeting. Women, on the other hand, needed to see color in greater detail for their equally important task of discerning edible berries and other food from poisonous varieties.

It sounds so simplistic (and, arguably, silly) but that is it. The modern ramifications goes back again to shopping; the modern equivalent of gathering. Marketers entice females with products designed to grab their attention and spark the evolutionary preference for pattern/colors and a preference for round shapes. Straight lines or polka dots; that's what men and women come down to. 

Don't laugh unless you have a better explanation.    

Did I mention before - I love Polka Dots.  

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Political Cartoons 6/18






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Everyone have a wonderful Father's Day.
I have a trip to San Antonio, TX
coming up June 25-28

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Anticipating Father's Day


Dad's day sale. How did they know what I needed?






Friday, June 16, 2017

Just The Right Shoe

My Collection of "Just The Right Shoe" Miniatures


I am not what one would call a collector. Growing up my Uncle worked out of the country and my mother and grandmother would received mail, so I collected the stamps of interest. Not exactly what one would call a "Stamp Collector". Over the years, I have collected cameras. However, I see these more as tools than collectibles. I do have items that make up museum quality vintage computer memorabilia. Old unit record wiring boards, magnetic core memory, and original IBM-PC and IBM-AT motherboards.  Also, I still have my slide rule from engineering school. I know things only a geek would collect.    

Raine
Thinking Outside The (Shoe) Box
Beanie Babies -NO.  Although I did find miniature shoes to be fun. Take a look at the photo above that is a portion of my collection. Each one of the shoes, cold press resin, are approximately 4" long and represent the artist, Raine's, creativity and love for shoes. The shoes were in gift shops and department stores and just about everywhere back in the early 2000's. The creations were marketed under the name "Just the Right Shoe" and came in it's own little shoe box. You are correct in assuming you got only the one shoe - The right shoe of course. Cute.

The details are obsessively exact, right down to the hint of Velcro peeking out from under the crinkled-leather strap. The colors are perfect and match what one would expect the shoe to be. Every tiny shoe gives the appearance of having once had a tiny foot inside it, doing wonderfully tiny things in a tiny and magical world.

I am not anticipating these becoming investment items or ever being featured at a Southerly’s auction; Just fun. 

Here is what I could find on the collection: 

The "Just The Right Shoe Collection" was launched in 1998. The collection was an immediate success on both sides of the Atlantic. In 1999 the British Guild of China and Glassware Retailers awarded the collection “Best New Collectible of the Year”. Raine was awarded the "Rising Star" award from the USA-based National Association of Limited Edition Dealers, who also awarded the "Collectible of the Year" award to the brand in 2000. The first “Just The Right Shoe” to be sculpted was the Ravishing Red Shoe. Now most all of the pieces are retired with no new ones are being made and there are few left for sale.  (Some on eBay).
 
Raine's whimsy, historical insight and scrupulously realistic style are combined in the creation of Just The Right Shoe; miniature collectibles which honor and memorialized the great creations in women's fashion throughout history. Source the May 2-8, 2002 issue of the North Bay Bohemian


I place one on my desk from time to time just to facilitate a smile;  A passion on display. Anyone else out there that collected "Just The Right Shoe"




Thursday, June 15, 2017

Beach Time

My Beach Walk
I live six miles from the ocean. This past Memorial Day I had a super nice picnic with my kids at a private condominium beach close by. The water was warm at 81 degrees and the surf was about 2 ft. What a beautiful day and time. Note to self - spend more time at the beach.

There are mornings, when not working, that I walk on the beach. Where I live there is over four miles of unrestricted beach access. Parking is free along the ocean drive and from the street there are numerous wooden dune walk overs to the ocean's edge. There are even showers at each walk over so you can wash the sand off before driving home. In my opinion, one of the best beaches in Florida. There is something about the fresh breeze off the ocean, the warm sand and sound of the surf that is so relaxing. 

I purchased the top in the layout above at Banana Republic a few days ago, 40% off. There is the extra feminine touch of added bows in the back where the straps meet the bodice. It is so cute and will be perfect for my morning beach walks. It is loose and cool and can be worn without a bra or with a bathing suit underneath. I had my seamstress put in a notch in place of the top button and slight front darts. The white denim shorts are from several years back and are also Banana Republic. Similar here:

If I am going to walk on the beach, I always take the sandals so I can slip them off to leisurely walk in the surf. For longer walks, I wear the Keds that provide some support. Even walking on the sidewalk there is a clear view of the ocean between the sea grape done/barrier hedge.  

Parking is always available. Typically there is a good number of walkers and even later in the afternoon you are seldom alone.   


This is a beautiful area and ESCAPES come in many flavors.  




Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Fashion Recycle - Embroidered Jeans


Today I give you the latest fashion recycle - Embroidered Jeans. We all know skinny is not new but you have got to love the embroidery. It is cute. These are from Bloomingdale's.  This is a trend just starting and for my opinion, I hope it replaces the torn jean look. That one I never got. 

Who What Wear describes embroidered jeans this way:


Flared, fitted, or slouchy, this season's biggest denim trend isn't about which style of jeans you wear, but how they're embellished—namely, with cool embroidery. Intricately stitched denim has popped up on the runway, the streets of fashion week, and some of Hollywood's coolest style stars.

Deborah over at the blog "Fashion after 40" also did a post on it a few weeks back describing it as; "Embroidered Jeans Are Exciting and New!" She did a great fashion layout pairing it with a plain blue t-shirt and sandals. a cute look.   

Anyone that thinks this is a new trend need go back no further that the great 1972 oldie "Cover Of the Rolling Stone" by Dr. Hook & the Medicine Show. Listen and enjoy. That song always bring a smile to my face.




Wonder - if I had saved my embroidered jeans from 1970, would they still fit?  Not likely - I think I am shorter.  Anyone else remember embroidered jeans?  

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Middle-age spread? Just Fake A Waist!

Yesterday I wrote about my time “Tightlacing” or wearing a corset. There was not an erotic or exotic reason other than to look my feminine differential best. It worked - giving a beautiful hourglass figure showcased by a nipped in middle.  What is there not to like? The complements poured in and my confidence soared. 

However as noted in an English Daily Mail Report,  “For every young woman with a slender waist, there’s an older one, lamenting her spare tire."  Wow that was a little indelicate - although true. For females, it is blamed on the lack of hormones and not just, careless eating. Men as they age just add to their naturally thicker middle (blame beer).  Nature can be so cruel at times. 

I put my "every day" corset wearing behind me, not seeing the necessity while working at home. I do believe that after more than 10 years of daily tightlacing, there is still some residual waist training. However my figure more closely resembles a liter Coke bottle today than hour glass. What is a girl to do?

The Daily Mail Report did offer some great suggestion for those of us in middle age - (I wish).  “So, apart from extreme dieting and drastic surgery, what can be done to regain a youthful body shape in middle age and beyond? The good news is there are plenty of fashion tricks which can help.”  Plenty of tricks – what a concept!

Please note - Not one of these suggestion included a mini-skirt, tights, a sweat shirt or a tent dress. Thank you.   

I will highlight one of the suggestions (tricks) and I have seen this dress on many sites.  I wore one very similar to my HS reunion last fall and it was a hit. The suggestion:


There are many optical illusion dresses for sale on the High Street at the moment but this one from Ted Baker is one of my favorites. It is incredibly flattering, yet age-appropriate. The paneling creates the impression of smaller hips and a smaller waist.  (Suggested underneath is a good foundation garment, Spanks)

The bottom line - Innovate, read, study and revert to tricks. The article in the Daily Mail Report offers great suggestions. I do love their choice for a trench coat and it is very similar to an a-line coat I purchase for last winter. There are many great suggestion to be found on sites like Susan after 60 and Fabulous after 40.  

Friend do not let friends go out looking dumpy.  Escape Beautifully!

Monday, June 12, 2017

Feminine Differential – Body Shape

2003
I had an hourglass figure at one time. Oh, it did not come naturally like the beautiful voluptuous figures of the 50’s; think Sophia Loren. No, my figure came for a device more in tune with early 1900’s. The corset.

I had a corset custom made about 20 years ago and after several trial and error iterations, had a custom design that I wore for over 10 years. Not just one, but a remake, about every two years. My corset maker kept my custom pattern on file and I just call in the remake. She would anticipate my need and would send an e-mail, “You should due for a new corset”.  

I became quite skilled at getting it on and wearing it 8-10 hours every day. Frankly, it became second nature and became comfortable after a period of adjustment. It worked well and unlike an elastic girdle/spanks it did not continue to pull in all day. It did not become uncomfortable as the day went on. 

What it did for your posture was amazing.  Slouching was not an option. 

I did have an amazing hourglass figure. My restricted waist was about 28-29 inches and by today’s female standards, acceptable. However, out of proportion were my shoulders. On many occasion, I would wear a skirt in a smaller size (size 6/8) but needed to wear a larger top/blouse (size 12/14); not ideal. There were times when the waist looked unnaturally small and/or restricted.


Any Crowder 1971-2010
Corsetmaker/Designer Wasp Creations
 

Why did I stop?  Two good reasons. My corset maker died suddenly and no one was there to take over the business. I just never found another. RIP, Amy Crowder (Wasp Creation) – I miss you. I wore the last corset until it was almost a rag. I do still have it and wear occasionally.  A testament to Amy's amazing work. 

Second, I was not going to an office every day as Rhonda. Plus, there was a third reason – It attracted attention. 

Although it produced an incredible figure, it is not a body shape typically seen every day. Especially in women of my age. At a party one evening someone approached me to discuss “Tightlacing” as corset wearing is described. I was happy to discuss it but realized that it was rather obvious.

So now, I stick with, spanks, and wear less fitted clothing, befitting a woman of my age. Always remember - You do need a good foundation – A feminine differential.   



Saturday, June 10, 2017

Friday, June 9, 2017

Conservative Politics 2.0




This is what happens when this decision is left to right-wing idiots.  The sources for this story The Huffington Post.

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GOP Activist Prays For Pro-LGBTQ Texas Legislators And Staffs To ‘Rot And Be Blown Away’

Steven Hotze is allied with Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick, determined to get an anti-trans “bathroom” bill passed.  He [Hotze] launched his curse, basically calling for God to kill all such legislators as well as their staffs:


May they be consumed, collapse, rot and be blown away as dust from their current positions because of their wicked works, thoughts and deeds. May people scorn them and nations abhor them...

Texas GOP governor Greg Abbott has called a special session of the Texas legislature for July 18, and, though he put a number of things on the agenda that weren’t completed during the regular session, don’t be fooled: the main reason this session was called was to pass a bill discriminating against transgender students. GOP Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick, the state senator who is obsessed with passing such a bill and is pulling all the strings, worked with colleagues to hold a must-pass Texas Medical Board bill hostage until they got the special session.  

Read the whole article By Michelangelo Signorile.  

Thursday, June 8, 2017

My Girl Bill



"My Girl Bill" is a 1974 hit song written and recorded by Jim Stafford. It was the third of four U.S. Top 40 singles from his eponymous debut album.

The song is about a man named 'William', or Bill, and his friend, the narrator of the song, who is taking Bill home with him. The lyrics employ double entendre, leading the listener to infer that the men are themselves involved in a romantic relationship as the title also suggests. However, a twist occurs at the end, when a woman is mentioned who has been a mutual love interest but has summarily rejected Bill.

"My Girl Bill" reached number 12 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 and number 7 on the Canadian pop singles chart. It was a crossover hit onto the Adult Contemporary and Country charts of both nations. The song was also a Top 20 hit in the UK and Australia. Source Wikipedia

Enjoy!

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Maybe Not Gone - SCC



Conference Hotel - September 14-15, 2017
Southern Comfort Transgender Conference (SCC) does have a schedule, a hotel and a website for 2017.  The scheduled date is September 14-16 at the Riverside Hotel Las Olas Boulevard, Fort Lauderdale, Florida.  If you know Fort Lauderdale you will recognize Las Olas is an elegant and fun entertainment, dining, destination; excellent choice. Las Olas is at the center of nightlife, shopping, and close to everything – including the beach - A very different approach than the previous two Florida SCC events. The hotel was far, far west and away from everything.  

Many of us veteran SCC attendees (well over 20 for me) were disappointed to see the announcement the SCC would be no more. Based on last year’s dismal attendance and disorganization, the fact that SCC closed was not a surprise. Well, if the Phoenix can arise, maybe SCC can also. I believe that SCC had an obligation to the Broward Tourism Council for three years and this is a fulfillment of that commitment - Just a guess. Fort Lauderdale has made a large effort to attract transgender travelers.  

The SCC website information is still sketchy. A price of $199.00 is reasonable, however, it is a little uncertain what is included. Posted is dinner Saturday evening, and seminar access. Although there is only one seminar on the schedule and no place for presenters to sign up. Also, there is no mentioned of a vendor area. 

So at best, it is going to be a scaled down event. Maybe that is perfect - SCC has never been about the seminars, vendors and the rubber chicken lunches/dinners with speakers. It has always been about the friends catching up and visiting. Taking time to talk in the lobby and over a glasses of wine in the hotel restaurant. Las Olas Boulevard will provide many quiet places for just that. 

I will likely be there and hope to see many old friends as well. Fort Lauderdale has much to offer that time of the year (off season) and airfare should be reasonable with Las Olas close to the airport (FLL). The hotel is only charging $89 per night, which is also very reasonable. 

I will keep you posted as more information comes available. If nothing else, it may be a great escape and min-vacation. The “All dressed up and somewhere to go” ESCAPE that SCC was from the very beginning.   

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Transgender vs. Transsexual


Yesterday I discussed one parent’s possible lack of understanding on what being transgender means. A mother much preferred noting her daughter to be a “tomboy” and not "transgender".  For those who do not understand they may feel that there is a slippery slope from gender non-conforming to transgender to transsexual.  

A pop culture example: Caitlyn Jenner by her own admission is transgender. However, is she also a transsexual? Having just finished her book I would say yes. She states unequivocally, not identifying with her gender assigned at birth and struggling all her life to fit into a male world. This is a story that I have heard many times and accept it to be “not a chosen reality", but a fact within someone’s frame of mind or in computer terms - operating system.

Spoiler alert - Caitlyn has undergone reassignment surgery. 

One definition of being transgender: You may not identify with the gender assigned to you at birth and/or express your gender in a non-conventional way. Transsexual people, on the other hand not only feel a disconnect with their gender but with their assigned sex as well.

No one can influence one into becoming any of the above. It is a state of mind, like left handed, dyslexic or artistic. Accepting the reality may take time but the state of being is just there. I am happy with the umbrella term transgender and comfortable using it.

Example: Several weeks ago, I had my annual wellness physical. My doctor ask – Is there anything else? Wow, what a leading question. I wanted my medical records to state that I was transgender. I stated for the record that I am transgender and then ask the Doctor, did he understand? He stated yes, but to be sure, I added, “I am not seeking body changes through medical surgeries – I am content with my body. However I do express my gender in a non-conventional manner.”  That is the way it was left…. 

I am pleased that there is a term that does fully convey my reality.    



Monday, June 5, 2017

Tomboy vs Transgender

My tomboy t-shirt 
I read an interesting NY Times opinion piece.  “My Daughter Is Not Transgender. She’s a Tomboy” by LISA SELIN DAVIS. ( 4/18/2017)

It has been debated on several blogs as transphobic, and not accepting; One called it a gross form of denial another child abuse.  Here is a excerpt from the article: 



The message I want to send my daughter is this: You are an awesome girl for not giving in to pressure to be and look a certain way. I want her to be proud to be a girl.

And she is starting to be. She is already vigilant about women’s rights. She does not understand why there are separate men’s and women’s sports teams, why women earn less and why they don’t run our country. She identifies as a tomboy, because that’s what some kids at school told her she was, though she has also said, “Why is it a tomboy?” When kids say she’s in the wrong bathroom, she tells them, “I’m a girl,” and invariably they say, “Oh, O.K.”

The kids get it. But the grown-ups do not. While celebrating the diversity of sexual and gender identities, we also need to celebrate tomboys and other girls who fall outside the narrow confines of gender roles. Don’t tell them that they’re not girls.

….She is my hero. Or rather, my heroine.

Kids are living in wonderful times.  Times when they can find support, know they are not alone and have the internet for research. The problem is not the kids but the parents. An extreme example: Josh Alcorn, the Ohio teen who committed suicide in 2015 would still be alive has she receives acceptance at home. Leelah's (Josh’s) suicide note stated, she struggled for a long time to gain her parents' acceptance as a transgender teen.

Parents do not be judgmental. Give guidance like, stay in school, study hard, choose your friends wisely, be true to yourself…. Parents, do not try and make your child into something they are not. Your undue pressure and denial will cause self-doubt and insecurity.    

Growing up I had much freedom of self expression with out judgement. Using my own intelligence I choose a correct course for myself. For that I am forever grateful.