Wednesday, March 31, 2021

I Celebrate Transgender Day of Visibility


International Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV) is an annual event occurring on March 31 dedicated to celebrating transgender people and raising awareness of discrimination faced by transgender people worldwide, as well as a celebration of their contributions to society. (Wikipedia)

This seem as good of a place as any to address an anonymous comment I received a few day ago on my "As A Boy" post. The writer is a high school and elementary school classmate.  

Only God can save you Xxxxxxx William's you must return to (my little town in Virginia) and surrender your life to Jesus #Trump2024. 

First, no surprise on the Trump thing. Well Joe, I do not see that any salvation is necessary. My salvation is being free of a religion that imposes fundamentalist / controlling views on others. Was not Jesus teaching mainly about love? I am not feeling the love here - only a contemptuous demand.  I am proud to be visible, out, and spreading understanding and love. 

Today is about being proud, visible and happy.  It is a time to celebrate being transgender and non-binary. It is a time for people around the globe to acknowledge the courage it takes to live openly and authentically. 

Today is our day.



Tuesday, March 30, 2021

Ted - Liberals/Conservatives

Psychologist Jonathan Haidt studies the five moral values that form the basis of our political choices, whether we're left, right or center. In this eye-opening talk, he pinpoints the moral values that liberals and conservatives tend to honor most.

Maybe the baby brain is not the clean slate we once thought.  Maybe it is more than environment and the way you are raised.  A super interesting talk. from the pre-Trump times of 2008.  

Monday, March 29, 2021

Why It's A Big Deal....

 When Men Wear Women's Clothes In Public

From Paired Life

Man wearing woman clothing from Quora


For most women, wearing women's clothing in public is not a big deal. It's something we do everyday without so much as batting an eyelid. We can also wear men's clothing out in public without too much trouble either. When was the last time someone took issue with a woman wearing a sweater and jeans, for example (besides in some whiny Craigslist posting, and Craigslist postings don't count as reality anyway.)

For men however, the act of wearing women's clothing in public is something of an act of defiance. It breaks the rules. It shocks onlookers. It draws furtive glances and giggles.

Not all of these things are bad. Most of us grow up within this double standard never questioning it. I know I certainly didn't until I actually met a man who wore lingerie and began to see the world through his eyes. It's easy to judge people for not seeing the inequality, but the fact of the matter is, as humans we tend to see only those things which effect us. You could call it being self centered, but in reality it is probably more a result of the fact that there is just no real way to comprehend all of the social issues in the world at one time.We only have so much brain space, and much of that is taken up with the task of not falling over when we walk.

So then, when we first see a man wearing women's clothing, be it a skirt, a dress, some panties, or even just carrying a purse, our little minds are blown.

Some people react to this change with anger and try to reject it. 'It's wrong', they say, or 'It's gay'. (Thereby rejecting the behavior by associating it with a group which has traditionally been marginalized and stigmatized.)

Other people are more on the fence. 'Huh. Okay. I guess if he wants to it's okay.'

Still other people love the idea and embrace it fully. There's some evidence that there are genetic markers associated with being receptive to change. People highly receptive to change are generally liberal in political outlook and don't get too upset when they encounter worldviews markedly different from their own. People who are not receptive to change tend to become defensive or aggressive when presented with views, ideas or realities which conflict with what they have come to accept. It doesn't make the behavior any less bigoted or wrong, but it does explain the logical disconnect which occurs when people become outrageously upset over things that really do not affect them (ie, when men wear women's clothing.)

If you want proof of that wild and unsubstantiated claim I just made, check out this TED talk on Conservative and Liberal morality. It is sure to learn you good on this subject. (More on this in tomorrow's Blog) 

Of course, the genetics of temperament only indicates how we feel about a subject on a reptilian, primal level. It is not an excuse for ongoing bigotry, or for hurting those around us by enforcing our limited world view upon them. When we understand the motivations which drive us, we have the chance to overcome them, live a happier life, and leave others to live happy lives as well.

Saturday, March 27, 2021

As A Boy....


It is never too late.

Friday, March 26, 2021

Fleabag - Get Out There and Flirt

I love a Party - Grab the night by the ..... and flirt!

Thursday, March 25, 2021

Johnson & Johnson – Shame on you

The following represents my experience, which may or may not be typical.

My doctor's office contacted me back in early December and ask If I would like to participate in a clinical trial for a Covid-19 vaccine. At that time no Vaccines were available. I said yes. My biggest concern was that the trial could interfere or prevent me from getting a vaccine in the future when the Emergency Use Authorizations (EUA) were to be granted.  

The trial was to be a double-blind trial with 45,000 to 60,000 people around the world either getting the real vaccine or a placebo. This was a phase three trial where safety no longer being the main issue. I was told explicitly that when EUA occurred, if I got a placebo, I would be offered the real deal. This was critical for the rumors were rampant that Moderna and Pfizer-BioNTech were very near EUA.  

Being that my age group is so susceptible, I saw this as an opportunity to jump to-the-head of the line.  And yes there was an altruistic side maybe doing my part to get the vaccine into the market ASAP.  This was win-win.  

My trial was utilizing Johnson & Johnson’s Janssen COVID-19 Vaccine (J&J).  

After signing voluminous pages of legal documents (wavers and informed consent) I was given a shot on December 31. Again I question my options on getting a real vaccine when available in the event I received a placebo.  I was assured I could be un-blinded "at will" and get a shot on the open market. Or when J&J received EUA I would be provided a true vaccine, if necessary, and continue in the study. 

Disappointingly, my body did not react in any way to the shot I received. After I received the shot I was told I need to check in twice a week (web-app) for any symptoms and visit again the trial office in two weeks.  I complied. 

The second visit was accomplished and on the third visit I was given a second shot. A good sign; why would they waste time giving me a second placebo? Most troubling at this visit was that I was hurriedly ask to sign another packet of legal documents. No reason was given and if was to continue in the study this was necessary.  Again, there was no reaction to the shot number two.  

Let's backup - Johnson & Johnson has been reeling from bad publicity and needed to do this right to counteract a huge legal settlement.  According to Google:

In May 2020, Johnson & Johnson announced it would discontinue sales of its talc-based baby powder in the US and Canada. The company said it "remains steadfastly confident in the safety of talc-based Johnson's Baby Powder," but said that demand had dropped off in the wake of the lawsuits. 

I so looked forward to the peace of mind the vaccine would bring. However, buried in the second modified consent form there was a statement indicating that people who got the placebo might have to wait up to two years to get the vaccine if they got one at all.

This was counter to all assurances provided verbally. 

Three weeks after J&J got EUA (February 27, 2021), I requested my status and wanted to be provided the real deal in the event I received a placebo. The risk was to large. One was going to need a vaccine card to travel or enter events. 

After a week of calls (one to me at 8:00 pm), I demanded to be un-blinded. I was told I received the placebo.  I was also told, “J&J vaccine would not be providing me a true vaccine.  Go to the open market and get your shot”. After being unsafe for three months with the study, I was now back at the end-of-the-line.  

Fortunately and after a lot of persistence, I got the Moderna shot Tuesday evening March 23.  

For a company that so desperately needed to get this right, they have left one-half of their 45,000 participants at risk with no hope. What advantage is there to allow participants to needlessly get sick or die; you have the EUA!  The study could continue to study efficacy.  A good thing.    

Johnson & Johnson – Shame on you. See also this NY Times article.  My experience mirrored this couple's.  


This is how Pfizer handled the issue: 

But the debate is far from over. In an October statement, Pfizer said that it “would have an ethical responsibility to inform all study participants about the availability of an emergency authorized vaccine.” The company said it would propose to the F.D.A. that volunteers who got the placebo could get the real vaccine. Amy Rose, a spokeswoman for Pfizer, said this week that its position hadn’t changed.

Tuesday, March 23, 2021

Feminine Differential - Wear A Scarf

 24 Ways to Wear A Scarf

World's Most Versatile Accessory

If you know me, you know I adore my Hermes scarf collection. Aside from their sentimental value (a decade of gifts from my husband), silk twill scarves are my chic and endlessly versatile secret for adding color and flair to my capsule wardrobe.

Read all of jenn's Suggestions and watch the video on "A Scarf Styling Trick". 

Monday, March 22, 2021

Top 5 Myths About Feminine Men


This is a must read from the Paired Life Site.  Each of the 5 item below is expanded and well thought out.

Photo of Bill Kaulitz.


        Top 5 Myths

1) Feminine Men Are Gay

2) Feminine Men Are Weak

3) Feminine Men Are Selfish

4) Feminine Men Make Bad Boyfriends or Husbands

5) Masculine Men Are Better Protectors

Final Thoughts:

Women have greatly expanded their horizon of existence in the last two generations. Why is it that we seem to not want men to do the same? Society seems terrified by men who go beyond their classical gender role of provider and protector. All the more reason for you guys to explore this new life that’s available to you

Saturday, March 20, 2021

Friday, March 19, 2021

Thursday, March 18, 2021

I Love A Success Story - Elliot Page

Elliot Page becomes first trans man to appear on Time magazine cover

Written by: Oscar Holland, CNN
Published 17th March 2021

Eliot Page has become the first transgender man ever to appear on the cover of Time, as the Canadian actor opened up about his decision to come out last year.

The 34-year-old, whose movie credits include "Inception" and two installments the "X-Men" franchise, will appear on the front of the magazine's forthcoming issue under the headline, "I'm fully who I am.

It is Page's first major interview since publicly disclosing his gender identity in December. Speaking to Time reporter Katy Steinmetz, he described the mixed reaction to the announcement, made via Instagram, in which he revealed his pronouns as "he" and "they."

"What I was anticipating was a lot of support and love and a massive amount of hatred and transphobia," Page is quoted as saying. "That's essentially what happened."

The actor, who earned an Oscar nomination for his role in 2008's "Juno," also discussed his childhood, saying that he "felt like a boy" from a young age. He recalled the "feeling of triumph" at being allowed to cut his hair short aged 9.

Page, who previously came out as gay in 2014, also spoke about undergoing top surgery, a move he described as having "completely transformed my life." He goes on to discuss the struggle for trans equality, as well as the entertainment industry's "crushing standards" and "pervasive stereotypes about masculinity and femininity."

"Extremely influential people are spreading these myths and damaging rhetoric -- every day you're seeing our existence debated," he said in the interview. "Transgender people are so very real."

The cover was shot by trans photographer Wynne Neill, who posted the cover image to Instagram on Tuesday, describing it as a "dream assignment."
"I have been wanting this and working towards this for so many years," Neill wrote in the caption. "I'm so proud of Elliot and I am so grateful to the trans elders who risked everything to make this moment happen."

Page also posted the cover to Instagram, writing: "With deep respect for those who came before me, gratitude for those who have supported me and great concern for the generation of trans youth we must all protect, please join me and decry anti-trans legislation, hate and discrimination in all its forms."

Page pictured in Toronto in 2019, over a year before publicly disclosing his gender identity. Credit: Rich Polk/Getty Images


Wednesday, March 17, 2021

Estrogen Therapy May Benefit the Brain



PUBLISHED: 14:37 EST, 25 March 2019

Estrogen therapy given to transgender women boost memories, heightens senses and hones motor skills by improving brain connections, study finds.

  • The hormonal or endocrine and the central nervous system work closely together 
  • Before surgery, most trans women take hormone therapy to encourage their transition, but some quit taking estrogen and other hormones after surgery
  • Off hormones, they experience similar symptoms to menopause, which can also come with brain fog 
  • A new Brazilian and Canadian study found that being on estrogen improved the way the trans women's' brain regions communicated 
  • It boosted connections between the thalamus and areas for fine motor skills, memory and learning, emotions and sensory perception  

Taking estrogen after gender-affirming surgery improves brain connections key to memory, learning and emotion in transgender women, a new study finds. 

Not only does this suggest that trans women should keep up hormone therapy post-op, it also underscores the deep connection between hormones and brain connectivity. 

After having bottom surgery, removing the testicles, trans women experience the same symptoms that post-menopausal women do, such as hot flashes and night sweats. 

The discovery, made by scientists at McMaster University in Ontario, Canada, and at the Hospital de Clínicas de Porto Alegre in Brazil, suggests that estrogen therapy may benefit the brains of trans women and post-menopausal women alike. 

As research advances, we are discovering more and more how central hormones are to many physical processes - and how interconnected these systems are. 

The hormone or endocrine system plays a key role in instigating everything from how we process food to how stress effects the body and even our heartbeats. 

And the new research sheds light on how sex hormones affect the brain, too. 

For trans women, gender-affirming surgery can do wonders to dispel lifelong dysphoria, in turn improving mental health and overall quality of life. 

As the trans community and trans issues are finally becoming more socially accepted, doctors have seen a swell in the number of people seeking and having gender-affirming operations. 

In the case of trans women, a complete transition means removing the testicles and penis - and with them the production center for male hormones. 

Prior to surgery, many trans women take estrogen - in addition to testosterone blockers and progesterones, in many cases - to encourage their transition. 

These hormones have a four-part effect on trans women's bodies and minds. 

Since post-menopausal women have the same symptoms and challenges when their bodies stop producing estrogen, this work suggests that hormone therapy may help protect them against the cognitive symptoms of menopause, like brain fog, too. 


Read more at the DailyMail

But more recent research suggests an even more complex relationship between hormones - estrogen in particular - and the brain. 

Namely, as the Canadian and Brazilian research team reports, higher estrogen levels encourage connection and communication between the thalamus and brain regions the dictate our fine motor skills, learning, emotions and sensory perception. 

This may explain the common reports of things 'feeling different.' 

'We found taking estradiol' - an estrogen replacement - 'strengthened the thalamus' role as a 'relay station' for sensory and motor information in the brain,' the study authors said. 

'This finding is a great advance for the neuroendocrinology sciences,' said lead researcher Dr Maiko Abel Schneider of McMaster University in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada.      

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

Feminine Differential - Cost of Style

There is no question that this fashion layout contains a beautiful outfit. I put it together from a recent Ralph Lauren (RL) "Collection" label offering. One can only dream. If you are tall (count you blessings girls) this is stunning outfit. It looks like something Melania would wear. Side note - I will miss seeing her style.  

Melania wearing a sky blue
 cashmere suit by Ralph Lauren Collection

This is not meant to pick on Ralph Lauren and RL has always been one of my favorite designers.  In the past I have enjoyed his store in Palm Beach and at times purchased there when items were on sale.  I have a good friend that works there and I would get calls when the sales got good. Also I enjoy browsing the on-line store.  

Recently I have read that the brand was having financial problems as so many fashion names. To help there seems to be a new direction taking place. Not one that is favorable for the average, middle-class shopper. At a time of economic troubles this makes little long term sense.* 

Forbes describes the situation like this:

All were finding (Kate Spade, Michael Kors, Coach, and other luxury brands) what retail veterans already knew, that once an upscale brand gets “taken downstairs,” as they say, bringing it all the way back up is difficult and rare. Yet for RL Corp., a far larger business than those others, it had to be done.

Personally I see the changes as abandoning their core constituency and general market. Good luck, because I have always enjoyed the styles. For now I am only an observer; not customer.  

RL Alligator Purse - $29,500

The above layout is all 2020 Ralph Lauren Collection:  Dolman-Sleeve Sweater ($1290.00);  Herringbone Pencil Skirt ($1190.00); Celia Calfskin Pump ($675.00) or the pump in ostrich ($995.00).  For a seasonal outfit all put together, that is a whopping $3155.00.  Now dear friends, that is a feminine differential, if you dare.


PS: A business has the absolute right to choose their clientele and use price to discriminate. For years RL has had their outlet brands that are manufactured for that venue and that brand bares little resembles to their designer labels. 

As I look in my closet I have a good number of RL fashion and have always liked the way the pieces work together. I just believe it is extremely short sighted to shrink you market for a quick return alienating other loyal customers. Under current limited market conditions plus the fact that Ralph Lauren at 81 is the majority stock holder, I understand the rational.      




Monday, March 15, 2021

The Birdcage - 25 Years Ago

  Celebrate with these 25 facts about the iconic movie

From:The Gainesville Sun

By: C. A. Bridges Tue, March 9, 2021

Grab your white wine! The schnecken beckons! This week marks the 25th anniversary of "The Birdcage," the smash hit directed by Mike Nichols with a screenplay by Elaine May, starring Robin Williams, Nathan Lane, Gene Hackman, Dianne Wiest, Hank Azaria, Dan Futterman and Calista Flockhart.

Twenty-five years ago, gay marriage was not only illegal, it was banned in most states. But on March 8, 1996, audiences flocked to see something unusual in movie theaters: a lighthearted movie where openly gay men were the heroes and a family with gay parents was loving, happy and committed.

The film not only gave Lane, Flockhart and Azaria their first big Hollywood breaks, it may have helped make mainstream the idea of a non-heterosexual family.

Nathan Lane
"'You look tired' means 'you look old.'
And 'you look rested' means 'you've had collagen.'

The plot of "The Birdcage" is simple. Armand Goldman (a subdued, sarcastic Williams) runs a successful drag club in South Beach, Miami, and his longtime life-partner, Albert (Lane at his flamboyant, high-strung diva best), is the star. Armand's son (Futterman) gets engaged to a young woman (Flockhart) whose parents are ultra-conservative (Hackman and Wiest). All Armand's son is asking is for Armand to change his clothes, house decorations, job, voice, mannerisms, and, well, Albert, and play it straight for the length of one uncomfortable dinner.

Robin Williams was fresh from his own gender-bending movie, "Mrs. Doubtfire," which broke a different kind of cultural ground by showing flexible gender roles and demonstrating how separated parents can work out what's best for their kids — without Hollywood magic somehow reuniting them.

In honor of the film's anniversary, here are 25 facts you may not know.

Read the whole article - 25 Reasons to love the movie.

Sunday, March 14, 2021

Friday, March 12, 2021

Biker Babe

2009 Harley-Davidson V-Rod Muscle

Last week's post on "Bikes" generated the most views for any single day; close to 10,000. it even exceeded post about shoes. I am so shocked and not sure what that says....  

It also stirred up a latent desire to ride again. Unless you have had a bike/ride, it is hard to describe the freedom, excitement and pure pleasure derived. Younger, I would love riding in Virginia on the twisting country roads. Even in Florida there are wonderful rides along out-of-the way beach drives that only local know about. 

Maybe there is one more bike to be added to my long list of fun rides. I will keep you posted.

*V-Rod - The Harley that Harley purist hate; I  love it.  Motorcycle Cruiser wrote:

The V-Rod was intended to bring in more than the usual suspects, and it did. It became the company's best-selling bike in other countries. In America, V-Rod buyers often came from other brands, attracted by its modern engine, excellent performance and not-the-usual-cruiser style.


Hobe Sound - The Road Calls

Thursday, March 11, 2021

Las Olas Boulevard, Fort Lauderdale


BY: Erica

A Brief Encounter Leads to a Great Lunch

 I am a long-time crossdresser having ventured out into the everyday world for the first time at the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta in 2011. In the ensuing years, Southern Comfort Conference moved to southeast Florida and experienced a new leadership team. Initially, the Florida venue was at the Bonaventure Hotel & Conference Center in Weston located right on the edge of the Everglades. 

Subsequently, the decision was made to move the conference headquarters to the chic Las Olas Boulevard’s Riverside Hotel in Fort Lauderdale. Las Olas Boulevard offers great dining, trendy shopping, vibrant nightlife, and all within walking distance of The Riverside Hotel. Additionally, Southern Comfort Conference provided a schedule of daily seminars covering everything and everything related to transgenderism.

 Better said the seminar array included everything from plain vanilla crossdressing wig selection to being schooled in the ins and outs of gender reassignment surgery. At the 2018 conference, one of the session monitors and also a seminar presenter was none other than our very own Rhonda Williams. 

Just before Rhonda’s presentation, I had the opportunity to introduce myself to her. During our brief conversation, we agreed to get together for lunch sometime in the future. Well, you can probably guess how that luncheon commitment went! Life got in the way and as time marched forward there was another change in the Southern Comfort Conference leadership, the corona virus pandemic launched with a vengeance and we all put “our alter ego” presentations on hold in an attempt to stay safe. And, no luncheon occurred. 

At my very first Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta, I was able to develop a friendship with the Conference activities director. Over the next decade, we stayed in touch, and when we both received our second vaccination a plan was hatched to let our hair down (actually I have very little hair to “let down”) with a three-night stay at the Riverside on good old Las Olas Boulevard. 

Well the moons lined up, no conflicts emerged and we were off to Fort Lauderdale. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I remembered the luncheon conversation with Rhonda. So, I sent out the Bat-Signal wondering if a response would be forthcoming. Lo and behold the next day Rhonda responded that she would love to get together. 

This past Saturday Rhonda, the Southern Comfort Conference activities director and myself convened at Riverside’s riverfront Boathouse Restaurant. As fate would have it we got the last 3 person table with an unobstructed view of the New River. And WOW!!! Instant chemistry. Three peas from the same pod. 

All with engineering backgrounds, all on Medicare, and all in very nice South Florida Saturday outfits. (National Wear A Dress Day) The two-hour lunch went by too rapidly and reached a hurried conclusion as the skies opened up for a several-hour rain. As we departed each other’s company promises were made to repeat the meetup. Given the adage “The more the merrier!” I will ask Rhonda to make a note on her blog of our next trip to Las Olas Boulevard and maybe some of the blog’s readers will be able to join us. (I will keep you posted)

Or, if you would like to be included in our next soirée feel free to contact us through Rhonda’s contact page.  

Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Tuesday, March 9, 2021

Transgender vs Gender Dysphoria

The book I recently finished reading, "It Never Goes Away” by Anne Lauren Koch, discussed the difference between transgender and clinical gender dysphoria. Side note on the book; It is an excellent book that I highly recommend. Once you get past the medical talk and the author's overt financial privilege, the last third of the book is a must-read for anyone considering surgical transition.

Here is my personal take on transgender vs gender dysphoria.

Transgender people have a gender identity or gender expression that differs from the sex that they were assigned at birth.  We all accept that transgender is an umbrella term including transsexuals, transgenderists, those that  cross dress, and anyone transitioning.  Recently gender-queer, non-binary, third-gender, gender non-conformist, and two-spirit have found their place under the transgender umbrella.  

The degree to which individuals feel genuine, authentic, and comfortable within their external appearance and accept their genuine identity has been called transgender congruence.  Many transgender people experience gender dysphoria, and some seek medical treatments such as hormone replacement therapy, sex reassignment surgery, or psychotherapy. Not all transgender people desire these treatments, and some cannot undergo them for personal,  financial or medical reasons. (Wikipedia) 

I personally am very comfortable with bringing transgender. It has taken me 70+ years to arrive here; better late than never I guess. Today I live a good portion of my life as a female or rather as my gender definition of self.  Most interact with me as female without overt prompting and passing is irrelevant to me. I much prefer acceptance with most interactions occurring as I am perceived. I am way past correcting someone for "mis-gendering". How I present is my prerogative and how they view me, theirs. This is my brand of being transgender. 

I have come to understand that not all can compartmentalize being transgender. This became obvious within the two support groups I started years ago. I insisted that the groups be open and accepting to all; not just for those that cross-dress.  At that time most support groups did not accept transsexuals. Through my groups, I had my first exposure to true gender dysphoria. 

According to Norman Spack, a founder of the gender clinic at Boston Children’s Hospital:

Gender identity disorder” was dropped from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), U.S. psychiatry’s bible for diagnosing mental illness. A new condition called “gender dysphoria” was added to diagnose and treat those transgender individuals who felt distress at the mismatch between their identities and their bodies. The new diagnosis recognized that a mismatch between one’s birth gender and identity was not necessarily pathological. It shifted the emphasis in treatment from fixing a disorder to resolving distress over the mismatch.

According to Wikipedia, gender dysphoria (GD) is the distress a person feels due to a mismatch between their gender identity and their sex assigned at birth.

The American Psychiatric Association permits a diagnosis of gender dysphoria in adolescents or adults if two or more of the following criteria are experienced for at least six months' duration:

  • A strong desire to be of a gender other than one's assigned gender
  • A strong desire to be treated as a gender other than one's assigned gender
  • A significant in-congruence between one's experienced or expressed gender and one's sexual characteristics
  • A strong desire for the sexual characteristics of a gender other than one's assigned gender
  • A strong desire to be rid of one's sexual characteristics due to in-congruence with one's experienced or expressed gender
  • A strong conviction that one has the typical reactions and feelings of a gender other than one's assigned gender

Besides, the condition must be associated with clinically significant distress or impairment. The DSM-5 moved this diagnosis out of the sexual disorders category and into a category of its own. "It shifted the emphasis in treatment from fixing a disorder to resolving distress over the mismatch" (Scientific American)

Going back again to my brand of being transgender.  I am not gendered dysphoric or feel I have gender identity disorder.  I have a family that I love dearly. I want to always be to them, the person they perceive me to be. I have had a successful business career in the male gender that of which I am very proud.  I have never seen my being transgender as incapacitating or sought counseling to cope with being transgender. Neither am I depressed as to a path forward. 

I was always put off by the old antidote, “What is the difference between someone that cross-dresses and a transsexual?  Answer: five years.”.  Although knowing at an early age my gender perceptions were different, I grew up accepting my differences as just part of my personality – like dyslexia. I knew that a gender reassignment surgical option was available, growing up when Christine Jorgensen was in the news. I never perceived that a surgical solution was for me; a fix was not necessary. I have always seen my own personal acceptance of “self” as more important.  

My transgender sisters that seek surgical solutions, I fully understand that necessity.  For today, I am happy with my personal transgender place under the umbrella. 

Monday, March 8, 2021

Three Easy Pieces - Don't Overthink


Sometimes putting together a cute outfit can be so easy.  I saw the photo on the right on Pinterest and knew I had the pieces from this year and last. The pants are Talbots "RELAXED CHINOS - STRIPE", sold out but sure to come back soon.  I like that they are tapered at the leg and have a cuff that adjusted depending on the heel. (a feminine differential)

The knit top is Venus - "Relaxed V-Neck Top".  I love the way it gathers at the bottom and can be worn long/short - tucked/not.  It also travels well.  

A white pair of spring/summer sandals are a must for the beach and pool.  They can be dressy for a lunch out or casual for the market. 

Don't overthink - Just Escape! 

Sunday, March 7, 2021

Saturday, March 6, 2021

Friday, March 5, 2021

I Love A Success Story - Nikki Hayden


Nikki Hayden - Wall Poster at Heathrow Airport

Hi all, (from Nikki Hayden)

Firstly, thank you for looking at my portfolio :)

I'm Nikki Hayden, a transgender woman living in Central London. I'm a trans campaigner and host events for a record label.

I am interested in being more "out there" in regards to my campaigning so looking to work with creative individuals and teams to create media which we can both use going forward. I've taken part in a few different campaigns the last few years, the biggest being my most recent which was for Heathrow Airport (see pictures)

If you think you could help with this and would like to work with me, please get in touch.


Thursday, March 4, 2021


The Bike Collection...

I read with pleasure SKYBIKER posts.  We have similar interest with our love to dress up and to have a motorcycle.  I do not ever remember doing both at the same, although the challenge does exist.  

I started riding in 1965 when I shared ownership of a Honda S90. The Honda craze started about the same time with the Beach Boys song, "Little Honda".  What had been a sub-culture was now mainstream and cool. It was not just a motorcycle - it was a Honda. My little Honda S90 would go 55 MPH down hill and I was hooked.  I remember taking my girlfriend to a movie on the Honda and leaving half-way through the movie because riding was more exciting than the movie ever would be.  Plus you could ride all night on 35 cents of gas.   

My next bike was a Honda 350; a real motorcycle.  Electric start with lots of power and fun built in. What a classic this bike was. During this period I had  three babies and not much money (one car), so I rode the 350 to work.  My second car. My limits were - not raining and a temperature above 40 degrees (f).  Below 40 I could not put on enough sweaters, gloves, and coats to fight the wind chill.  

One of the best engineered bikes ever was my next Honda; a CX550.  It was an engineering marvel with a v-twin, water cooled, shaft driven, 5 star wheels and  huge tires. It only had electric start. The torque was amazing and the CX was the first V-twin motorcycle that Honda ever built. It had a low seat that worked for my short legs.  One side story on this bike - It was the only bike I ever dropped.  It is amazing the strength you can muster when your bike is laying on its side. No real damaged other than the embarrassment of it all.  

There is one bike that is in between my two favorites. It was the Kawasaki 750 Vulcan. I was envisioning it was like the KZ1000* that a friend had; wow was I wrong. It had a lot of plastic and a engine that looked like a washing machine.  Twist the gas for power and there was none and corrosion occurred everywhere in just a few months. I did not keep that bike long and purchased a new bike that became my favorite.         

My last bike was as a Suzuki VS750 Intruder.  Wow what a classic profile and look.  Plenty of raw power. Even though it had a traditional chopper look (big tire in back - small tire in front) it was  water cooled, and shaft driven. I added a windshield and a little leather bag hanging off the back.  I guess the "girl" was trying to emerge the best she could. This was the best looking bike I ever owned and I still miss it; gone 10 years now.  

I still miss the freedom and thrill of riding. Maybe again?  What was your favorite?  

*Trivia: What TV show featured the KZ1000?