Thursday, September 28, 2023

The Legacy Project At Palm Beach Dramaworks

I had a big honor back in February.  The “Legacy Project” is a way that stories and life's experiences are recorded and communicated for posterity. Lesser known facts and even deeper life happenings are recorded to be passed on for generations, family and friends. My local LGBTQ Community Center working with The Dramaworks Theater, put the 2023 project together. An evening where activists within the community would be interviewed and then honored at a public presentation. Two were interviewed as a couple, so there were three interviews of four people.  

My recorded interview was about 2 hours long.  It was then professionally edited and distilled down to a 29-minute video.  

Part of the Legacy Project purpose is to build bridges with the young and those who have gone before them. Unknown to me at the time, the young woman who did my interview and narrated, went to college with my grandson. They knew each other very well. There were big hugs that evening between them with the,  "I did not know..." and "What a small world..." conversations.  

At a local performing arts theater, all four of us were honored with about 500 in attendance to be there and see the videos. All of my family attended, either live or by Zoom, including my grandkids. Also, several of my former workmates were my guest.  

I cried, from just having so many of my activist/transgender stories being told and being seen by my family.  I even got to give the concluding remarks and encouraged everyone that, "Now is the time for us all to be activists.”  What an emotional evening with dinner after with my family.  I love you all.  

The Legacy Project is a nationwide project with all the videos being sent to the National Archive for storage and posterity.

I want to thank Compass my LGBTQ center, and The Dramaworks Theater for an evening that I will never forget.  A highly memorable and emotional night that will live on. .

Legacy Project 2023 - Interview with Rhonda
29 minutes
"More about Rhonda than you ever needed or wanted to know."

Please fast forward to that point if you cannot watch all of the other moving stories.


Personal Note:  I am in Bar Harbor Maine for a family wedding this weekend. My next post will be Monday October 2nd.  Everyone have a wonderful weekend. 

Wednesday, September 27, 2023

I Love A Success Story - The Browsers

Meet Nick And Bianca, The Transgender Couple That Naturally Conceived 2 Kids

Nick And Bianca Browsers

by HernĂ¡n Tamargo
Published on 09-29-2020

Bianca and Nick felt like they were trapped in someone else's body ever since they were kids. It wasn't until their early 20s that they finally accepted that their gender identity didn't match their assigned sex, thus acknowledging themselves as transexuals. In their own words, never had they imagined they would one day find true love and even build a family of their own. Up next, a moving story of a transgender couple who managed to naturally conceive two children, thus defying the binary categories of modern medicine.

Paving The Way For Greater Trans Visibility

The Browsers' story has become viral and the "dad becoming pregnant" news received widespread media attention worldwide. Never had they imagined they would become that famous!

While not all transgender people want to have children or even identify themselves as "men" or "women", their story will definitely help foster a greater respect and understanding of trans lives. It's definitely a great step towards trans visibility!

Tuesday, September 26, 2023

My Girlhood Was Stolen From Me

As a trans woman in my 20s, 'Gilmore Girls' made me realize just how much of my girlhood was stolen from me

Sarah Guinevere Smit Sep 23, 2023

Sarah Guinevere Smit

When I first started watching "Gilmore Girls" in 2014, I was 20 years old and had just left home to attend university in another city.

There was something so comforting about the fuzzy nostalgia and witty femininity on "Gilmore Girls."  It gave me renewed hope, starting with the opening lines of The La's "There She Goes" that introduce us to Lorelai.

While living away from my family for the first time, I was transported into Rory Gilmore's struggles at Chilton and Yale as if through a magic mirror. Like Rory I was always a bookish girl, academic and timid. She was raised by a single mother and had a deadbeat dad, and so was I.

Our similarities drew me deeper into the show, and I didn't want to leave. 

But there was just one glaring difference between my life and Rory's — one I'd known about myself since puberty. I was a transgender girl.

Watching and rewatching the show throughout my 20s, I came to realize that although Rory's life was what I yearned for, it was Lorelai's that I deeply related to.

On the "Gilmore Girls" pilot, Lorelai tells her mother she "stopped being a child the minute the strip turned pink." It was the moment she stopped being a girl and became — if not yet a woman — a mother. 

It was a reminder that, whether cis or trans, girlhood and womanhood are fragile, volatile conditions that women can be robbed of or thrown into without consent or warning. 

The first time I became acutely aware of my chromosomal and hormonal birth defects was when I saw signs that puberty was starting to make me look like a boy. My girlhood ended the minute I turned 13, just as it was supposed to be beginning.

First, my wavy, white-blonde hair turned to dark-brown curls almost overnight, making me look more like my father than my mother. My blonde hair had been like a promise my body made to me. The promise, as I understood it, was that no matter how people saw me then, I'd eventually grow into the beautiful woman I knew myself to be.

Sarah Guinevere Smit

My voice slowly deepened, and I no longer got called "ma'am" or "miss" when ordering family pizzas over the landline every Saturday. Now it was "sir." 

This was also the time when my feminine behavior started being policed. I was disallowed from watching TV shows "meant for girls" like "Sabrina the Teenage Witch," "Winx Club," and "Unfabulous," and learned to feign an interest in "Jackass" and "Monty Python."

When I came out of the shower or went to the beach, I felt forced to show my chest, which I preferred to cover with a towel or a shirt. I felt innately shy about revealing any part of my body, but especially my chest. My brief experience with pubertal gynecomastia — when boys develop excess breast tissue during puberty — didn't make this any easier, even if it was another sign to me that my body was fighting just as hard to be a girl as I was.

I started having tantrums about "not looking right" that I didn't have the words to explain. I now understand them as my first breakdowns over gender dysphoria, or the conflict between my assigned gender and my gender identity.

Without that terminology or support of any kind, I just knew I felt like an ugly girl with a broken body.

Like Rory's best friend Lane Kim, who hid her true self away under floorboards in her room, I'd learned to conceal my gender melancholia over the years. Eventually, I nearly forgot the person I really was. My adolescence as a girl was spent trying to learn how to be a convincing boy — which seldom worked.

I felt like I was playing a character. As I entered my 20s, I knew that character had to evolve into a man, and trying to become one is still the most painful and humiliating thing I've ever experienced.

Coming out to my mother was the cathartic exhale I needed

Eventually, at 28, I came out to my mother after a visit home. We were seated on an airport bench minutes before my flight. The illusion that I'd ever been her son evaporated, and after some gentle questions and a hug, she paused and told me, "I always wanted a daughter."

I cried the whole flight home and began to see how curses can become blessings. I thought about how Lorelai's truncated girlhood gifted her Rory and the inseparable mother-daughter bond they came to share.

I had to learn to accept that I never had the girlhood I needed. But just like for Lorelai, becoming a woman at any age is not the end of being a girl. It's the heart of it.

Monday, September 25, 2023

National Girls’ Day into Night

Erica, Rhonda and Miranda 
at the Boathouse Restaurant 
The Riverside Hotel Fort Lauderdale

National Girls’ [Day] Into Night is a celibration that’s observed annually on September 22nd. It encourages women to get together with their friends and throw a girl’s day / night meetup. 

I was honored that Erica and Miranda, shared their "Escape" in Fort Lauderdale with me. A long afternoon lunch at the Boathouse at the Riverside Hotel. Great conversation and fun. Thank you.     

Sunday, September 24, 2023

Political Week In Review 9-24-2023


A Self-Imposed Disaster

Schumer in talks with McConnell as shutdown fears grow:
 ‘We may now have to go first’

CNN: For weeks, Democratic and Republican senators have been watching the House with growing alarm as Speaker Kevin McCarthy has struggled to cobble together the votes to pass a short-term spending bill along party lines – all as he has resisted calls to cut a deal with Democrats to keep the government open until a longer-term deal can be reached. The initial plan: Let McCarthy get the votes to pass a bill first before the Senate changes it and sends it back to the House for a final round of votes and negotiations.

...If Schumer’s assessment is correct, that would leave McCarthy with a choice: Either ignore the Senate’s bill altogether or continue to try to pass his own bill in the narrowly divided House where he can only afford to lose four GOP members on any party-line vote.

Saturday, September 23, 2023

Friday, September 22, 2023

Why The GOP Is Now The "Fascist-Republican" Party


The Modern Republican Party Is Hurtling Towards Fascism

BY: *Robert Reich
April 15, 2023

Robert Reich
America no longer has two parties devoted to a democratic system of self-government.

We have a Democratic party, which – notwithstanding a few glaring counter-examples, such as what the Democratic National Committee did to Bernie Sanders in 2016 – is still largely committed to democracy.

And we have a Republican party, which is careening at high velocity toward authoritarianism. OK, fascism.

What occurred in Nashville last week is a frightening reminder of the fragility of American democracy when Republicans obtain supermajorities and no longer need to work with Democratic lawmakers.

The two Tennessee Democrats who Republicans expelled from the Tennessee house have been restored to their seats until special elections are held, but the damage to democracy cannot be easily undone.

The two were not accused of criminal wrongdoing or even immoral conduct. Their putative offense was to protest against Tennessee’s failure to enact stronger gun controls after a shooting at a Christian school in Nashville left three nine-year-old students and three adults dead.

They were technically in violation of house rules, but the state legislature has never imposed so severe a penalty for rules violations. In fact, over the past few years, several Tennessee legislators have kept their posts even after being charged with serious sexual misconduct. And the two who were expelled last week are Black people, while a third legislator who demonstrated in the same manner but was not expelled is white.

We are witnessing the logical culmination of win-at-any-cost Trump Republican politics – scorched-earth tactics used by Republicans to entrench their power, with no justification other than that they can.

Democracy is about means. Under it, citizens don’t have to agree on ends (abortion, healthcare, guns or whatever else we disagree about) as long as we agree on democratic means for handling our disagreements.

But for Trump Republicans, the ends justify whatever means they choose – including expelling lawmakers, rigging elections through gerrymandering, refusing to raise the debt ceiling and denying the outcome of a legitimate presidential election.

Wisconsin may soon offer an even more chilling example. While liberals celebrated the election last Tuesday of Janet Protasiewicz to the Wisconsin supreme court because she will tip the court against the state’s extreme gerrymandering (the most extreme in the nation) and its fierce laws against abortion (among the most stringent in America), something else occurred in Wisconsin on election day that may well negate Protasiewicz’s victory.

Voters in Wisconsin’s eighth senatorial district decided (by a small margin) to send Republican Dan Knodl to the state senate. This gives the Wisconsin Republican party a supermajority – and with it, the power to remove key state officials, including judges, through impeachment.

Several weeks ago, Knodl said he would “certainly consider” impeaching Protasiewicz. Although he was then talking about her role as a county judge, his interest in impeaching her presumably has increased now that she’s able to tip the state’s highest court.

As in Tennessee, this could be done without any necessity for a public justification. Under Republican authoritarianism, power is its own justification.

Recall that in 2018, after Wisconsin voters elected a Democratic governor and attorney general, the Republican legislature and the lame duck Republican governor responded by significantly cutting back the power of both offices.

Meanwhile, a newly installed Republican supermajority in Florida has given Ron DeSantis unbridled control – with total authority over the board governing Disney, the theme park giant he has fought over his anti-LGBTQ “don’t say gay” law; permission to fly migrants from anywhere in the US to destinations of his own choosing, for political purposes, and then send the bill to Florida’s taxpayers; and unprecedented prosecutorial power in the form of his newly created, hand-picked office of election “integrity”, pursuing supposed cases of voter fraud.

Without two parties committed to democratic means to resolve differences in ends, the party committed to democracy is at a tactical disadvantage. If it is to survive, eventually it, too, will sacrifice democratic means to its own ends.

In these circumstances, partisanship turns to enmity and political divisions morph into hatred. In warfare there are no principles, only wins and losses. America experienced this 160 years ago, when the civil war tore us apart.

Donald Trump is not singularly responsible
for this dangerous trend, but he has legitimized
 and encouraged the ends-justify-the-means
viciousness now pushing the GOP
toward becoming the American fascist party.

See also the Huffpost article: Director At Florida Liberal Arts College Likens Ron DeSantis’ Takeover To ‘Fascism’


*Robert Reich, a former US secretary of labor, is professor of public policy at the University of California, Berkeley, and the author of Saving Capitalism: For the Many, Not the Few and The Common Good. His new book, The System: Who Rigged It, How We Fix It, is out now. He is a Guardian US columnist. His newsletter is at robertreich.substack.com

Thursday, September 21, 2023

The US has A Rich Drag History.

Here's why the art form will likely outlast attempts to restrict it 

y Scottie Andrew  April 29, 2023

My Note:This is an in depth look at "drag" in the US.  It discussed Julian Eltinge from 1917 to RuPaul's "Drag Race".  A must read...  Also, many may dislike CNN's political views, however, it has been a great supporter of our community during this period of Fascist-Republican attacks.


To many, the stereotypical image of a drag queen is one of a gay man dressed in exaggerated feminine getup, oversized wigs and heavy makeup. But drag's image  and history -- is far more complex.  
Joan Jett Blakk,
pictured during her
San Francisco mayoral run in 1999.
She ran for US president in 1992

Drag is a grand dame in a glittering gown, commanding the stage with a power ballad or disco classic. Drag is also an underground performer twirling onstage to Madonna's "Papa Don't Preach."

It's the glitzy cast of "RuPaul's Drag Race: All Stars" and small-town performers with dedicated local followings. It's a queen named Meatball dressed as a ghoulish exaggeration of George Santos, singing the "Greatest Showman" anthem "This is Me," and a king named Mo B. Dick in a firetruck-red pompadour and drawn-on goatee. It's cisgender and trans men, trans and cis women and nonbinary people. Its performers are gay and straight. It's masculine and feminine; it's neither or both.  

"Drag is the theatrical exaggeration of gender," said Joe E. Jeffreys, a drag historian and adjunct instructor at New York University, who noted that the artform constantly subverts "what people think they know about gender." 

Drag queens have long been leaders
in the queer liberation movement

At its core, drag is an art form that for over a century has affirmed and uplifted LGBTQ people who perform and enjoy it. But this year in particular, some US states have attempted to impose legislative measures that would impact where and when drag can be performed. In Tennessee, where the most restrictive measures to date were passed in March, people who perform in drag in an area where children could see them could be charged with a misdemeanor or felony. (The ban was temporarily blocked hours before it was expected to be implemented.)  

"Queer people have always found creative ways to resist the violence of their experience and norms that have tried to restrict our ability to live freely in the world," Testa said. "Drag is a process of that resistance. These communities formed as a response to harassment, exclusion and violence. I'm hopeful in the sense that we've done this before -- we never stopped doing it." 

Drag has survived for as long as it has because it's always been a vessel for expression for queer and trans people who've had to carve their own paths. It's why Alaska Thunderf**k, the blonde bouffanted winner of the second season of "RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars," first got into drag -- to make art that wasn't bound by rules. That, she said in an email, and to have pure, unadulterated fun.  

"The great thing about drag is that the second you think you've got it figured out, it changes and turns into something else," Alaska wrote. "That's why we'll always survive." 

Wednesday, September 20, 2023

Nashville elects Tennessee’s first openly transgender politician

Olivia Hill, 57, a military veteran, joins the Nashville city council in historic election

Gloria Oladipo  Sat 16 Sep 2023

Olivia Hill
Nashville elects Tennessee’s first openly transgender politician

A transgender woman won election to a seat on Nashville’s city council, becoming the first openly transgender person to be voted into political office in Tennessee. Olivia Hill, 57, secured one of the four open at-large seats on the metro council of Nashville, a politically liberal city in an overwhelmingly conservative state.

About Olivia Hill (From her WEB Site)

Olivia Hill was born and raised in Nashville, Tennessee. A product of Metro public schools, Olivia's roots are planted firmly in this city she loves. She has seen firsthand the kindness, strength, and creativity demonstrated by her fellow Nashvillians. She knows the vast potential this city offers.

A Navy veteran, Olivia served in the engineering division for ten years, seeing combat in Desert Storm. While serving her country, Olivia gained unique expertise in electrical engineering, a set of skills she utilized to become the Senior Supervisor of the Vanderbilt University power plant, managing a 24/7 operation with a budget of over 100 million dollars. Along her path to that role, she held every position, from plumber/pipe fitter, diesel mechanic, and gas turbine specialist to a welder, high voltage electrician, and union shop steward. After accumulating 36 years of experience in the engineering industry, Olivia knows the value of getting her hands dirty and the hard work it takes to keep crucial systems functioning.

Live Free: Olivia Hill Shares Her Story

In recent years, Olivia has served as a community leader, educating the public about the difficulties faced by women and the LGBTQ+ community. She is frequently invited to speak to many of Nashville's premier organizations, including the Tennessee Bar Association, the Metro Nashville Police Academy, Vanderbilt University, the Nashville School of Law, local churches, and Metro Nashville Social Services, as well as serving on the board of directors for the Tennessee Pride Chamber. In 2019, Olivia received the Chancellor's Heart and Soul award from Vanderbilt University. She was chosen as the LGBTQ Advocate of the year in 2020 for her dedicated service to the community.

Olivia plans to bring the full breadth of her experience and leadership skills to Nashville Metro Council. Dedicated to serving the communities she loves, Olivia will not shy away from the effort required to improve our already fabulous city.

Tuesday, September 19, 2023

Feminine Differential - Flare Jeans in '23 - A Revisit

I am going to give "Flare Jeans", one more look. My discussion a few weeks back centered on "Flare vs Skinny Jeans" both being in fashion this fall. I did purchase a pair of Macy's Flare Pull On Jeans  to try. However, I was not satisfied with the fit and especially the length. As one fashion blog stated,  "they are more for long legs" of which, I do not have. The ones I purchased were way to long and even with heels would have require extensive fitting.  Back they went. 

Not ready to completely give up on this season's hottest jeans, I found the above jeans on Amazon as "High Waisted Flared". Several reviews mention the shorter length; so worth a try.

What I do know is the length matters and I am interested in paring these jeans with heels and several existing tops. Polka-dot and stripe are two of my favorite casual looks. Stay tuned.

Post delivery review:  The Amazon Jeans are a keeper.  The length is perfect (size 8 - 29 1/2") and not such a pronounced "Bell Bottom" as the photo shows.  Definitely a little more style than "Boot Cut". However, not your 60's wide, bell bottom. A good look for me. The rise is high with a "trim-cut" down to the knee. 

These will look great with boots and heels. There is a good pronounced tight cut to the back and the stretch waist makes for an easy fit. The ever so minimal distressed area is a great feminine differential. I like these jeans.   


Monday, September 18, 2023



Be forewarned - a two hankey video. 

A young housemaid walked in on her boss's teen son all dressed up as a woman. Shocked, he accidentally tore his mother's dress and, since he was afraid of being exposed, he put the blame on the innocent maid. The girl had no choice but to take the blame and hide the fact that the teen boy wanted to be a woman. Will the truth be revealed? And what punishment will the housemaid endure?

Sunday, September 17, 2023

Political Week In Review 9-17-2023


The Southern Poverty Law Center -We monitor hate groups and other extremists throughout the United States and expose their activities to the public, the media and law enforcement.

Moms for Liberty is a far-right organization that engages in anti-student inclusion activities and self-identifies as part of the modern parental rights movement. The group grew out of opposition to public health regulations for COVID-19, opposes LGBTQ+ and racially inclusive school curriculum, and has advocated books bans.




Saturday, September 16, 2023

Friday, September 15, 2023

5+ Male to Female Fashion Rules Worth Breaking


By Lucille Sorella in Fashion

Femme Secrets:  When presenting yourself as a woman, there are some definite dos and don’ts to follow.

However, this doesn’t mean you need to be a slave to the “rules!” Many so-called rules are outdated or just plain wrong – especially when it comes to fashion and style.

Are you following these 5 male to female fashion rules? If so, it might be time to break them!

Rule #1: Dress As Feminine As Possible

Nobody pulls off the feminine look quite like transgender celeb, Gigi Gorgeous. But that doesn’t mean everybody needs to dress this way! The beauty of fashion is that you can express yourself however you want.

Whether your style is tomboyish, androgynous, or ultra feminine, anything goes – so enjoy your individuality and dress however the heck you want

Rule #2: Don’t Go Without Shape wear

Breast forms, a corset, gaff, and hip pads can transform the most masculine body into an hourglass. When you want to feel like a bombshell, shape wear is a girl’s best friend!

However, ignore rules that says you must don all these contraptions every time you step out en femme. Being comfortable in your clothes is a better rule to follow, so wear the pieces that make you feel good and forget the rest.

Rule #3: Always Wear High Heels

While high heels are undoubtedly sexy and feminine, there’s no rule that says you must wear them all the time. Flats can be equally alluring if you want to be comfy, or if you’re on the tall side and don’t want to accentuate your height.

Love the look of heels but don’t want to go all out? A kitten heel (1″-2″ tall) looks elegant and can help feminize your walk – without the pain of stilettos.

Rule #4: Dress Like The Women In Your Area

I often talk about how helpful it is to observe cisgender (genetic) women. If your goal is to blend in, it’s a good idea to adhere to the style norms in your area.

However, in case you haven’t noticed, many women dress sloppily or put little effort into their appearances. If that’s not your style, you do NOT have to follow in their footsteps. Look as fabulous as you want… and maybe they will start to follow your lead!

Rule #5: You Must Always Match

There are so many choices in women’s clothing that putting outfits together can be daunting. While you should always look coordinated, forget about old fashioned rules that say you must match from head to toe. Not only is this boring, it tends to look costumey and dated.

Need a little help with your outfit skills? Check out this article for a simple 5 step formula on putting outfits together.


I am going to add to this list of rules to break: 

  • Pantyhose are such a give away.  In Florida they are to hot and the last female I saw wearing then was coming from her job at a bank.  The double knit uniform skirt did not help either.  

  • Jewelry that makes noise.  I loved hearing my bangles clink and the bigger the better. So dated now.     

  • Never wearing sneakers.  I work retail and there have been days where breaks were few.  My most comfortable heels were a first day choice - wrong.  There are so many cute sneakers that go with  jeans and skirts.  Comfort beats pain at the end of the day.

  • To much makeup.  If you spent three hour doing your makeup you are wearing to much makeup.  Watch what other women are wearing and see that less is more The exception is a formal evening or wedding. 


Thursday, September 14, 2023

My Daughter Is Not Transgender

 She’s a Tomboy.

By Lisa Selin Davis
April 18, 2017

My Note:  This is a mother's interesting article on her daughter;s preteen development.  I applaud her for being so open.

I heard the term "tomboy" early in my pre-teen years and it was used to describe a neighbors granddaughter that came to the country to spend part of the summer. She wore jeans, refused to wear a dress, even to church on Sunday and was so much better at baseball than I  In my heart, I wanted to be her, but the boy opposite. 

The inequity of my childhood desire remains.   .  

,     __________________

“I just wanted to check,” the teacher said. “Your child wants to be called a boy, right? Or is she a boy that wants to be called a girl? Which is it again?”

I cocked my head. I am used to correcting strangers, who mistake my 7-year-old daughter for a boy 100 percent of the time.

In fact, I love correcting them, making them reconsider their perceptions of what a girl looks like. But my daughter had been attending the after-school program where this woman taught for six months.

“She’s a girl,” I said. The woman looked unconvinced. “Really. She’s a girl, and you can refer to her as a girl.”

Peppermint Patty
The most "tomboyish" girl
in the Peanuts comic strip


Later, when I relayed this conversation to my daughter, she said, “More girls should look like this so it’s more popular so grown-ups won’t be so confused.”

My daughter wears track pants and T-shirts. She has shaggy short hair (the look she requested from the hairdresser was “Luke Skywalker in Episode IV”). Most, but not all, of her friends are boys. She is sporty and strong, incredibly sweet, and a girl.

And yet she is asked by the pediatrician, by her teachers, by people who have known her for many years, if she feels like, or wants to be called, or wants to be, a boy.

In many ways, this is wonderful: It shows a much-needed sensitivity to gender nonconformity and transgender issues. It is considerate of adults to ask her — in the beginning.

But when they continue to question her gender identity — and are skeptical of her response — the message they send is that a girl cannot look and act like her and still be a girl.

She is not gender nonconforming. She is gender role nonconforming. She does not fit into the mold that we adults — who have increasingly eschewed millenniums-old gender roles ourselves, as women work outside the home and men participate in the domestic sphere — still impose upon our children.

Left alone, would boys really never wear pink? (That’s rhetorical — pink was for decades considered a masculine color.) Would girls naturally reject Matchbox cars? Of course not, but if they show preferences for these things, we label them. Somehow, as we have broadened our awareness of and support for gender nonconformity, we’ve narrowed what we think a boy or a girl can look like and do.

Let’s be clear: If my daughter does begin to feel that the gender in her mind and the sex of her body don’t match, I will be supportive. I will research puberty blockers and hormones (more than I already have). I will listen to her and make decisions accordingly, just as I did when she turned 3 and asked for a tie and a button-down shirt. Then she saw her father wear a blazer (for once). Her eyes rounded and she said, “What is that?” as if she were seeing a double rainbow spread across the sky.

She was in love with a look. That look evolved — sadly she moved from Patti Smith’s tie and blazer to the Dude’s stained T-shirt and sweatpants. But it has always just been a look, even if it came with a rejection of princesses (which also delighted me) and a willingness to play family with both boys and girls as long as she could be the dog or the police officer.

I want trans kids to feel free and safe enough to be who they are. I also want adults to have a fluid enough idea of gender roles that a 7-year-old girl can dress like “a boy” and not be asked — by people who know her, not strangers — whether she is one.

The message I want to send my daughter is this: You are an awesome girl for not giving in to pressure to be and look a certain way. I want her to be proud to be a girl.

And she is starting to be. She is already vigilant about women’s rights. She does not understand why there are separate men’s and women’s sports teams, why women earn less and why they don’t run our country. She identifies as a tomboy, because that’s what some kids at school told her she was, though she has also said, “Why is it a tomboy?” When kids say she’s in the wrong bathroom, she tells them, “I’m a girl,” and invariably they say, “Oh, O.K.”

The kids get it. But the grown-ups do not. While celebrating the diversity of sexual and gender identities, we also need to celebrate tomboys and other girls who fall outside the narrow confines of gender roles. Don’t tell them that they’re not girls.

My daughter is happy with her body and comfortable with the way she looks, thousands of times happier and more comfortable than I am or ever have been. She is my hero. Or rather, my heroine.

Tuesday, September 12, 2023

Geisha Makeover in Tokyo

A must do for men and women

Two guys experience getting a geisha makeover in Tokyo including a fascinating history about male geisha in Japan.

I will not spoil any of this story. Read it all and dream. The studio Geisha cafe in Tokyo

Monday, September 11, 2023

Never Forget 9/11

Never Forget 9/11/2001

A day to remember.

9/11 News Coverage: 7:45 PM: Congress Sings "God Bless America"
They were united that day - Why not now?
We are all Americans.

Feminin Differential - Ankle Boots With Skinny Jeans

 How To Wear 

Glamour and Gains

Shown are my vintage Coach Soft Calf, Jemma, Ankle Boots / Booties.  I purchased these many years ago on a business trip and it was love at first sight. Shown are the black booties and I later found the chestnut (brown) ones on eBay. 

They fit well and have a solid heel that works for me. With some effort these go on and provide room to tuck the slim jeans at the top. I love this look and it is so trimming for the legs (elongate) and add a blousie top, waist trimming. 

Shown are my Talbots SLIM ANKLE JEANS that fit my legs perfectly. Make sure the jeans you choose are long enough if you plan on tucking them into the boots.   

The YouTube below offers other suggestion for wearing Slim jeans and ankle boots.