Friday, December 14, 2018

Time Is Precious

A little followup to yesterday's post. The greatest gift you can give yourself is time.  Never to be wasted. 


Thursday, December 13, 2018

What Time Is It?

There was a time when getting older, a demograph to which I belong, meant being invisible, accepting limits, and being/going quiet. Oh yes, the proverbial rocking chair. Maybe it’s a “baby boomer” thing; we have never accepted limits and have challenged the norms starting with rock-n-roll, the min-skirt, civil rights and protesting needless wars. I love being where I am today. 

Baby boomers changed the world, ended a war, created a new culture of values and morphed our style and politics with every move of the Beatles. In the end, it was all rock and roll to us. We won the right to vote, and then turned around and voted for Nixon. (today Trump)

We baby boomers have been puzzling ourselves and the rest of world since then. Who are we? As we enter our 60s and (70s), we have to answer that question ourselves. If our high point was when we were 19 or 20, or what will be our second act?

One thing being a baby boomer embodied was to speak your mind and accept with caution We were indulged and told that our opinions mattered.  We were told we could grow up to be anything and collectively we fought for social change. Even today, I am far less willing to accept being quiet. Going quietly into the sunset… Never! 

To accentuate that fact, I am really starting to not care what other people think. I find myself smiling a lot and because of that, drawing others into conversations. I respect myself and want others to understand who I am. Maybe they can come to accept how I present. If asked a direct question, I answer it. 

Sure, we are a minority, being transgender. I had nothing to do with create this gender incongruity and have every right to live my life as anyone else. Not just live, but embrace my life. I am the master of my own history and my last chapter is yet to be written. I hope to make it interesting and it may even have a few plot twists.  

Getting older does cause one to understand that life does not last forever. I get notices every few weeks about a high school classmate that is no longer with us or someone that needs our prayers. Life is not finite, so sitting in the rocking chair and doing nothing should not be an option. Or worse yet, being/doing something that is inherently not who you are. Doing nothing is a waste of a human minute - the most valuable commodity on the planet. Something you will never be able to retrieve, no matter how much money you have. 

What are you going to do with your time today?  ESCAPE! 

Wednesday, December 12, 2018

How to Walk in Heels & Stilettos

Stanna had a great post on the "Triumph or Downfall" of high heels yesterday.  Interesting and my sweet post on the height spectrum is 3" to 4". And I do love heels.  

Below is a cute video on walking in heels.  Nothing new here but just a fun look at a great pair of legs, with suggestions on getting up to speed in heels. Someone else that loves heels as much as we do. Her blog. "Wendy's Look Book " is packed with fashion advice for the young at heart and heel enthused.   



News: This evening is my company's Christmas dinner and party.  It is held after work at the office's theater and all are expected to attend.  I will be there! Rhonda is working there again after having been there before a few years back.  It is a worthwhile and valuable non-profit, serving the year round needs of a community deserving the support. More later on the job and facility. I think I will wear my red heels.  

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Feminine Differential - What's Inside Your Purse?

I was always been fascinated by the contents of the female purse. It is the Swiss Army Knife of life. Anything short of a nuclear weapon can likely be found in the purses of a collective female group.  e.g., need a band-aid; a receipt from a Macy's purchase, last decade; or a discount restaurant coupon - all there. 

I emptied my everyday purse (amazed at what ancient artifacts I found) and decided to show what I consider my essentials. How did I ever function with just pockets? 

What's in your Purse? 


Monday, December 10, 2018

My First Car - An Impala

Two weeks ago GM announced the end of the Chevrolet Impala.  Here is the sad announcement in the Detroit Free Press:

My '65 Chevrolet Impala 
 General Motors plans to ax the Chevrolet Impala as part of its dramatic restructuring announced this week, ginning up nostalgia for a vehicle name that first appeared in the 1950's.

The Impala has been called one of America's most iconic nameplates, but after 10 generations, the current sedan appears to share little but the name with its ancestors even as it has had some notable milestones in the not-too-distant past.

My first car was a ’65 Chevy Impala. It was two-tone with gold on the bottom and a cream colored top. It had a 300HP / 327 engine and I switched the three-speed column shift and installed a Hurst Floor Shift. There were other things I did with the most notable addition being “Mickey Thompson Mag Wheels”.  The wheels were beautiful and what a nice addition to the overall look of the car with narrow white sidewalls. The car was a beauty. 

I have always loved cars and will not bore you with the engine modifications; needless to say, it ran very well. My choice would have been the "SS" version with bucket seats and a floor shift already installed, however it was not available at the time.  

From 1958 to now, America always had the Chevy Impala. That was one piece of nostalgia that I could count on every year. The ’65 was not my last Impala and I did replace it with a much more luxurious, ’70; this one dark brown, with a matching vinyl top and much appreciated air conditioning.  

Over the years I have had some impressive/unique cars, including several Corvettes, a Gremlin, a Pacer, several Cadillac and my current SL-MB. Without question, my beloved car was my first – The Impala.  Goodbye old friend.  

'58 Badge - The First Impala

Note: Anyone else remember the unique "Factory Engine Option" on the  '58 Impala?  

Saturday, December 8, 2018

The End Is Near

Or "Escape" to your better place.

Friday, December 7, 2018

Is a New Lip Surgery on the Horizon?

BY: Vartan Mardirossian MD FACS

Women – and especially young women – have had a fascination with their lips for decades. Thick, full, pouty lips are considered beautiful and sexy, and because many women want to be beautiful and sexy themselves, they seek surgical procedures, implants, and injections. However, while stars like Pamela Anderson (in the 90's) and Kylie Jenner (more recently) were proud of their lip fillers and injections, these days, it’s all about lip lift surgery.

Kylie Jenner & the Start of Something Big

If you spend any time at all on social media, then you’ve probably heard of, seen, and perhaps even tried the Kylie Jenner lip challenge. This involved using a glass or other household item to create a vacuum and resulted in thick, full, pouty (and unfortunately, sometimes bruised or worse) lips. Kylie Jenner revolutionized the inflated lip look and later admitted to using fillers to get her gorgeous pout, and she even created the Lip Kits signature line of products designed to make that pout beautiful.

It was pretty shocking when Kylie came forward about having her lip fillers dissolved despite her extraordinary results, and while she hasn’t yet had another procedure, she admits to having used products like Juvederm and Restylane in the past. There’s little doubt that Kylie is still just as beautiful as ever, and while her lips are still one of her best features, people want to know if surgery is on the horizon.  

What You Need to Know about the Lip Lift

Unlike filler procedures which are considered minimally invasive, a lip lift is an actual surgery – but it isn’t up there with open heart surgery or even gallbladder removal. It’s actually quite a simple procedure that requires removing a small piece of skin just under the nose to help “pull” the top lip upward and create a pouted, fuller appearance. The lip rolls upward and outward with less skin between the lip and the nose. Lip lifts can cause scarring, and experts warn that many actresses and models have ruined their careers with this very procedure. It’s been around since the 1920's but comes in and out of vogue every decade or so.

Today, though, new procedures and technologies make lip lifts much less of a risk than they were back then. Scarring is minimal when the procedure is done by a capable and experienced surgeon on a patient who is a good candidate for that surgery. It’s important to keep in mind that lip lifts are only actually considered ideal for about 20% of the patients who want fuller lips due to inherent risks that surgeons cannot control on their own.

With all of this information in mind, the lip lift is a great procedure for certain patients, but for most, fillers remain the best option. Now that Kylie has dissolved her fillers, will she ask her surgeon for such a procedure, and if she does, will she be a candidate? Only time will tell, but there’s little doubt that men and women alike will continue to turn to fillers for lips, cheeks, and other facial areas to help them feel young and confident.

Note: Vartan is my doctor, business associate, and friend.  

Thursday, December 6, 2018

What you See....

Geraldine Jones aka Flip Wilson

His Famous line - “what you see, is what you get”. 

Flip Wilson - December 8, 1933 - November 25, 1998

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

Superman's Pal - Encore

In "Leslie Lowe, Girl Reporter," Jimmy is feeling emasculated after finding out that his girlfriend, Lucy Lane, makes more than twice as much money as he does.  So he demands a raise from his boss, Perry White, and, failing to get it, quits his job.  However, he finds himself unable to get a job anywhere else.  Rather than humiliate himself further by going to Perry White and asking for his old job back, he decides to dress up in women's clothing and apply for his old job under the guise of "Leslie Lowe."

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Feminine Differential - Security

On one of my first ever shopping "Escapes", I realized that presenting as female had associated risk. I became keenly aware of my surroundings. I wanted to park close to the door of the mall and was noticing if anyone was getting out of their car at the same time. The contrast was shocking.

My perceived vulnerability was shocking!

I never give any of these actions even a third, much more a second thought. I was concerned. I always thought that maybe the element of surprise might be in my favor, however just how fast could I react in heels? Wallet, money, credit cards all in my purse which could be easily grabbed off my shoulder. As female I understood something bad could happen or I could be harassed for no other reason than my presentation; "being feminine".

Was my skirt too short and inviting trouble?  Would getting mugged be my fault simply for what I was wearing?  No one ‘invites’ a mugging or harassment like it would be a everyday occurrence. No one wants to feel insecure or be harassed. I, as a feminine person just want to be comfortable, look good and go about my day-to-day activities.

This became very poignant one evening as I was heading into the mall, this time dressed not as a female. The same mall that I had shopped the night earlier. I watched as a woman, heading out, clutched her purse a little tighter and looked down, rather than solicit eye contact. The reality of this situation produced a wave of sadness as I was now aware of both sides.  

How ludicrous for politicians to say "A Scary Time For Boys", when adult females always face insecurities and harassment. To be feminine is to recognize this, act accordingly, and be mindful.       

Be careful - Be understanding!

Lynzy Lab

"The first step to solving a problem is admitting that you have one. We have a problem in our culture. Women are undervalued and often seen as sexual objects without brains, ambitions or abilities. This brilliant song  shines a light on the problem and allows all of us to start on the difficult journey of fixing the problem."  Writergurlny

Monday, December 3, 2018

Self-Made Man

2006 Book -  My Year Disguised as a Man is a book written by journalist Norah Vincent, recounting an 18-month experiment in which she disguised herself as a man—"Ned"—and then integrated into traditionally male-only venues, such as a bowling league and a monastery. She described this as "a human project" about learning. She states at the beginning that she is a lesbian but not transgender.

Norah Vincent spent 18 months disguised as a man. She relives the boys nights out, the bad dates - and what happened when she ended up in bed with another woman (The Guardian) 

In the book, she describes her experiences as a man in strip clubs, on dates, in a monastery, and as part of a men's support group.

In order to effectively pose as a male, Vincent acquired a buzz cut and flattened her chest using a small sports bra. She also hired a makeup artist to fake a five o'clock shadow and trained for months to imitate a deeper male voice. She changed her diet and exercise regime to "bulk up" with more upper-body muscle.

Vincent joined a men's bowling team, where she says "[the men] just took me in ... no questions asked." She eventually became friends with them, even coming along to strip clubs and dating women who had no idea of her true gender. She later revealed that she was actually female to the men, who "took it well."[4]

Vincent also recorded her book as a audiobook for Penguin Highbridge.

Vincent writes about how the only time she has ever been considered excessively feminine was during her stint as a man: her alter ego, Ned, was assumed to be gay on several occasions, and features which in her as a woman had been seen as "butch" became oddly effeminate when seen in a man. Vincent asserts that, since the experiment, she has gained more sympathy for the male condition, stating, "Men are suffering. They have different problems than women have but they don't have it better. They need our sympathy, they need our love, and they need each other more than anything else. They need to be together."  Source (Wikipedia) 

Also see the Guardian article entitled "Double Agent".


I remember reading the New Yorker article back in 2006 and it was fascinating.  Here is someone who documented male privilege by switching gender. What a concept. The book is out-of-print but can be found used on Amazon. If I remember correctly the experience had profound physiological repercussions on Nora. Here is a YouTube that provide more background:

 ABC 20/20

Saturday, December 1, 2018

Happy December

Happy December 1!


On sad note today:
I think he was a good president overall and had the best interest
 of the country in his heart. 

Friday, November 30, 2018

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Underneath the Makeup | Award Winning LGBT Short Film

No words needed - Spoiler alert - Tissues optional, but may be needed. 

Click on "Watch this video on YouTube" of Click Here if you are having problems seeing the video.  

Wednesday, November 28, 2018

We Do Have Friends!

Janet sent this link and it is encouraging to know that we do have friends.  I am going to post the whole article here because not all may have a Washington Post on-line subscription. Thanks Janet for passing this along during a time when we needed a good news boost.  


Apple, Facebook and Google among 56 businesses telling Trump not to weaken transgender rights

By Tony Romm
November 1 at 12:00 PM 

Source: Matt McClain/The Washington Post
Apple, Facebook, Google and Uber are among 56 companies that told the Trump administration on Thursday that they oppose any change in federal policy that would define gender on the basis of one’s biological sex at birth — the latest clash between tech giants and the White House over civil rights issues.

In a letter to President Trump, the businesses said such a policy would be discriminatory and harm their workers. The companies said they “stand with the millions of people in America who identify as transgender, gender non-binary, or intersex, and call for all such people to be treated with the respect and dignity everyone deserves.”

“We oppose any administrative and legislative efforts to erase transgender protections through reinterpretation of existing laws and regulations,” they wrote. “We also fundamentally oppose any policy or regulation that violates the privacy rights of those that identify as transgender, gender non-binary, or intersex.”

Last month, Trump said he is “seriously” rethinking how transgender people are treated under federal law, telling reporters that his administration has “a lot of different things happening with respect to transgender right now.” The effort has been led internally by the Department of Health and Human Services, which last year told officials not to use the word “transgender” in their budget documents.

The move marked the Trump administration’s latest effort to roll back federal protections for transgender people, including students who seek to use the bathrooms of their choice at school, and it drew an outcry from equal-rights organizations. Fifteen of those groups, led by the Human Rights Campaign and Out Leadership, organized a campaign to get business leaders to speak out against the Trump administration’s potential policy change.

Companies signing the tech-heavy letter include Airbnb, Amazon.com, Ben & Jerry’s Homemade, IBM, Intel, Lyft, Microsoft, Dow Chemical and Warby Parker. (Jeffrey P. Bezos, the founder and chief executive of Amazon, owns The Washington Post.)

“Transgender people are our beloved family members and friends, and our valued team members. What harms transgender people harms our companies,” the companies wrote Thursday.

The letter marks the industry’s latest salvo against the Trump administration over its treatment of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender Americans. Top executives at Google and Twitter sharply criticized the president last year after he issued an order that banned transgender people from serving in the military. And many of the same companies signed a joint letter in May 2017 opposing legislation in Texas that would restrict transgender students’ bathroom use.

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Feminine Differential - How Feminine Are You?

50 things that scream you’re one of the feminine guys (or want to be one). 

If you are wondering if people see you as one of the feminine guys, these are 50 signs that might not always scream it, but subtly whisper to those around you that you aren’t just okay with your feminine side, but instead you are trying to steal a woman’s thunder.

I listed my "YES"s not as a competition (so unfeminine) but to see where I fall on the list.  We have all taken those "blind" psychological tests that tell us if we are a woman or a man - Questions like, "Do you enjoy shopping?"  We know how to skew that test. However, this is an interesting list. There are no wrong answers and no scoring. Just an opportunity to look into ourselves and see what is considered feminine and where we fall.  Remember, it is not just how we dress.        

Note: This is just for fun and not meant to offend anyone.  Enjoy.. 

How Feminine Are You
#1 You cry… in front of people. Of course, when something tragic happens in your life, or if you lose someone, we are okay with seeing you cry. But, if you cry when your sports team doesn’t win, at Hallmark commercials, or just really at will, that signals that you’re one of the feminine guys all the way.

#2 You hold grudges. Guys are supposed to punch it out and get over it. If you are someone who is holding grudges, either let go or keep them to yourself. Grudges are so female!

#3 You sit in the passenger seat. Girls like a guy who likes to take control! Obviously, if you have been drinking and she is the DD, it makes sense *although she probably doesn’t appreciate that unless decided upon up front*. But if you hop in the passenger’s seat and let her take the reins ALL the time… not masculine, dude. 

#4 You take selfies. Selfies are way, way feminine. Enough said.

#5 You live and die by social media likes. Men aren’t really supposed to like anything on social media unless it involves politics or a joke about strippers. But, even those things you should secretly like, but keep it to yourself.

#6 You care about your hair more than girls do. If a guy cares more about his hair than girls do, and it prevents him from being adventurous or outdoorsy, that is way too feminine for our taste. Forget your fade and just let it go!

#7 You have more girl friends than guy friends. 

#8 You wear shorts that go above your knees. Men should cover their thighs, it just isn’t something most women want to look at. Pasty, hairy skin doesn’t scream masculine.

#9 You take longer to get ready than a girl. Having to wait for a guy is irritating enough. If we are doing it because he cares more about what he looks like than we do, it is a huge turnoff.

#10 You skip. Again, enough said… and if you even know how, keep it to yourself.

#11 You cross your legs. I get it, crossing your legs just feels good sometimes, but if you are a perpetual leg-crosser you should probably google the origins of crossing your legs and quit it!

#12 You use emojis. Unless they are sexual emojis meant to turn your girlfriend on, you shouldn’t be blowing kisses, making sad faces or waving your hands. Be a man, will you? [Read: Defining true masculinity – What does it mean to be a man?]

#13 You wear pink and aren’t tough. Only tough guys can wear pink. If you don’t have a six-pack, leave the Pepto-colored shirt for the muscle heads.

#14 You eat neatly. Guys should eat like a hunter and gatherer, not like they are having tea with the queen. If your plate is neater than anyone else and you put way too much emphasis on how to roll your spaghetti, you need to learn to roll with it.

#15 You decorate. One poster or record album sparsely placed is okay. If you are Feng-shui-ing, then you might want to take a good look around… it screams feminine.

#16 You do your dishes Johnny on the spot. Guys are supposed to have a sink full of dishes waiting for women to come rescue. Sure, we absolutely hate it and get pissed, but a clean and neat sink makes us question. There is such a thing as good irritation; they define our gender roles.

#17 Your outfit matches accessories and all. If your shoes match your shirt, belt, watch, ascot, and you even know what an ascot is, then it is time to examine your feminine side.

#18 You wear animal prints. Never cool. Camouflage okay, animal prints, so NOT.

#19 You drink cocktails with umbrellas. Fru-fru drinks have feminine written all over it. If you want a fancy cocktail, have the bartender put it in a beer mug. It will taste the same, and no one needs to know. 

#20 You get your butt hurt when someone teases you. Guys are not supposed to take things personally. If you call him a name, he is supposed to shoot right back. If you get your feelings bruised at everything that is said, that is more girl than guy behavior.

#21 You are overly sensitive about everything. Toughen up and take it like a man or you will just come across as a sissy.

#22 You wear a sweater vest and v-necks. Occasionally, maybe, but all the time? Not too hot.

#23 You are too affectionate with your mother. Not just a momma’s boy, if you cling to your mother, hold her hand, or even refer to her as “mother” as if she is the mother of all mothers, that isn’t very manly.

#24 You have a man purse *it’s a satchel*. No, it isn’t a fanny pack, or a satchel or a man bag, it is a purse. Period. 

#25 You gossip more than girls. Sure, all guys like locker room talk, but if you are gossiping about who is sleeping with whom at work or about what someone said to someone else, then you need to stop. If not, you’re definitely one of the feminine guys.

#26 You wax / trim your eyebrows. Ummm, really? Do I even need to explain this one?

#27 You notice when someone has an awesome purse. If you notice that a girl has a really cool purse and admire it silently, then you are probably one of the feminine guys.

#28 You will only buy name brands. It doesn’t show everyone that you have money. It says that you have been reading the latest fashion magazine, which is so not masculine.

#29 You know name brands.

#30 You are a wine “connoisseur.” It is okay if you are really serious about wine and over 50, but if you are a “winer” then it isn’t very manly, just pretentious and makes you one of the feminine guys.

#31 You cry at chick flicks. The fact that you even go is questionable. But crying… not allowed.

#32 You have a man bun. Don’t care if it is “in,” buns are for women only.

#33 You read… like not the Drudge Report… but novels and shit. Can’t keep up with the latest Danielle Steel book? Think about it.

#34 You have a subscription to a magazine, and it’s not Maxim. If you read People, Us, or anything in between, then you are way too worried about the world, which is all female.

#35 You want to have the “relationship talk,” even before she does. We want you sensitive, but not clingy. Don’t jump the gun… it isn’t masculine and again, makes you one of the feminine guys.

#36 You wear a visor. Okay maybe not everyone would agree, but I’m keeping it.

#37 You wear super skinny jeans. Skinny jeans are in and bad enough, don’t take it one step too far! (I wish)

#38 You have a toy dog. And you carry it around in your “purse.”

#39 You own moisturizer, and not for the reason you think. If your skin is softer than a baby’s behind, then you should really think about the signals you are sending… because you are one of the feminine guys.

#40 You love watching cat videos… or just cats in general. Enough said. Again.

#41 You have super neat cursive writing and use it frequently on thank you cards and “just to check in” cards.

#42 You wear gardening gloves to plant flowers. Men are supposed to get their hands dirty… what are you thinking?

#43 You love malls. Can’t get enough of the mall? Bad news for your masculine side. [Read: How to  be a man the way he really should be]

#44 You plant flowers to add a pop of color. If you are all about making your home curbside appeal awesome, that may be too much for coolness.

#45 You know what a pop of color is. Making comments about decoration like “color pop” is not showing anyone that you’re not one of the feminine guys.

#46 You watch HGTV, not to find out how to square a wall, but to find out what colors are in for the fall.

#47 You’ve never owned an action figure or a plastic gun in your life. Two things that are essential for guys growing up. Even if it was your parent’s fault, don’t let anyone know. [Read: Here’s how you can be masculine without being a jerk]

#48 You never leave the house without sunscreen. I get it… skin cancer, but guys are supposed to live on the edge. Not moisturizing with sunscreen as a morning routine, at least when your girlfriend is watching, is probably a good move.

#49 You fold your laundry with corners and edges. It isn’t that we don’t want our guys to be neat, or to do their own laundry, it is just that we don’t want them to spend so much time on activities that are primarily feminine.

#50 Your workout outfit is prettier than your girlfriend’s.  and most everyone else in the Gym. When a guy “works out” he is supposed to wear his ripped Led Zeppelin t-shirt, not his fancy performance wear. Look like a guy when you are working on those biceps.