Happy Haloween '23

AKA - Be Something Else Day 

Don't forget to "ESCAPE" and use the opportunity to show the world who you are.  Remember it is not a costume, but your reality.  A good day to explain that unchangeable fact to those you work with, have coffee with and love. Introduce to the world your true self.  

For those interested, here is my National Be Something Else Day - 2022  This is my Halloween story.  Halloween is a sacred day for us to"ESCAPE"! .  

You Only live once.  

I Love A Success Story - Caragh Donley

 
I Hid My True Identity For Decades. Here's What Happened When I Finally Revealed Myself At 63.

By: Caragh Donley*
Oct 11, 2023

Caragh Donley

"I had become resigned to living the rest of my life as if it belonged to someone I emailed with a few times but never actually met."

 

I never thought I’d be here. And yet just a few months ago, at the age of 63, I came out as a transgender woman.

First of all, I’m well aware there’s a cultural expectation in America that once you hit the age where 401(k)s become reality rather than theory, the most exciting experience you have left is seeing which closes up first — your arteries or your mind. This is supposed to be the time to start thinking about endings, not beginnings. Given all that, I realize how unlikely it is that anyone would take on perhaps the biggest do-over there is: gender transition.

Even worse, I’m doing this at a particularly treacherous time, when far too many presidential candidates and groups with words like “liberty” and “freedom” in their names have turned people like me into their political piñatas. To them, we’re just trying this out for some perverse thrill. However, being trans isn’t like experimenting with bangs. It’s not something you dabble with and then grow out of. It’s a feeling we’ve spent a lifetime trying to ignore until we either die fearful and silent, or decide that living whole and happy is worth having people hate us.

I’ve been trying to figure out which choice to make since I was 7 or 8 and had a recurring dream where Tabitha from ”Bewitched” would ask to hang out with me. I just had to eat this pudding-like stuff in a little paper cup first. I complied and suddenly I was a little girl, and we went off to play.

A few years later I started having another dream, in which I’d grow breasts that gave me the ability to fly. Then there was the dream where I felt super itchy and when I scratched myself, my skin peeled off to reveal that I looked just like Olivia Newton-John.

Read More:

It’s taken so long for me to find my path, but now that I have, walking along it appears to suit me. Recently, I had drinks with some friends I hadn’t seen for a while. After a couple of minutes, one of them stared at me, waving her hands in my direction, and said, “This just feels right.” That was a phrase I honestly never thought I’d hear. Now that I’m here, and it isn’t merely a dream, I just hope it’s not too late to set up that playdate with Tabitha.

___________________

*Caragh Donley is no longer hiding her age, so it’s safe to reveal she’s been at this writing thing a long time, working for outlets including People magazine, TV Guide, The New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, The Boston Globe, Emmy Magazine and Vanity Fair. She’s the author of “The Can’t-idates: Running for President When Nobody Knows Your Name.” In addition to her print work, she’s worked as a producer on shows including VH1’s “Behind the Music,” “The Queen Latifah Show” and “The Martin Short Show.” She is currently a senior producer with “The Kelly Clarkson Show.”

Political Week In Review 10-29-2023

 

A Girl's Best Friend

 

Brands Embracing the Gender Blur

November 3, 2016

CoverBoy James Charles, a 17-year-old
influencer and makeup artist

The trend of breaking down gender boundaries in marketing and products is growing, as more brands embrace the idea that gender isn’t what it used to be…

Gender is in flux. In our Genreless Generation trend, we reported that Millennials and post-Millennials are more comfortable with blending and bending gender, with 78% saying it’s ok for girls to be masculine and guys to be feminine. Another survey found that 38% of Gen Z and 27% of Millennials “strongly agree” gender does not define a person. These young consumers are ushering in things like gender neutral homecoming courts, and fueling a general broadening of gender definitions.

More brands are responding by ditching gender stereotypes and labels in store aisles and ads, or breaking out of “old constructs” in marketing, and leaving gender-specific tactics in the past. We explored one aspect of this trend in an article earlier this year, outlining the brands leaving machismo behind for Millennial men. Even those with a past rooted in old ideas of what guys like (boobs, beers, bikinis, etc.) are leaving old ideas of masculinity behind and testing new strategies to appeal to today’s men—including Axe, which introduced an entirely new approach with their “Find Your Magic” campaign, showing a broad, inclusive range of what young males can be interested in and look like. It’s a smart tactic to take, especially considering a recent study revealed only 30% of adult men under 30 said they were “completely masculine,” and almost one out of five identified as more feminine than masculine.

More recently, H&M took a similar approach for Millennial women, showing a range of femininity—women in dresses with shaved heads, legs spread on the subway, with strong muscles, unshaven armpits, and more. The complementary social strategy, which asked consumers to share what is means to be a lady, also sparked a discussion beyond fashion. For a generation that believes that gender exists on a spectrum, celebrating that spectrum is a huge positive, and the ad hit the mark with the young female consumers.

But other marketers and brands are taking gender blurring even further, not only showcasing a spectrum of what each gender can be and do, but pushing gender boundaries and taking a step into a “genderless” future. Last year, gender-blurring marketing was relatively new—Moschino Barbie made headlines for including a stylish boy in their ad but it was for a limited-edition designer Barbie actually targeted to an adult market. At the time, we noted, “The reality is that…young consumers, are not interested in what products their gender is supposed to buy or like. In fact, many of them are actively interested in breaking those barriers—and that’s an opportunity for brands everywhere. Limiting the consumers that might purchase your product to one gender is eliminating far too many, and this generation doesn’t want to be told that anything is boys/girls only.” That opportunity has been seized by some big name brands this year. In January, post-Millennial influencer Jaden Smith was cast as a model in a Louis Vuitton women’s wear ad, proudly wearing a skirt from the new collection. According to the brand’s artistic director, Smith “represents a generation that has assimilated the codes of true freedom, one that is free of manifestoes and questions about gender…Wearing a skirt comes as naturally to him as it would to a woman who, long ago, granted herself permission to wear a man’s trench or a tuxedo.” This month, in a move Fortune called, “genius Gen Z marketing,” CoverGirl introduced their first ever CoverBoy James Charles, a 17-year-old influencer and makeup artist, who first made headlines when his “seriously flawless” senior portrait went viral on Twitter. Now he’s promoting CoverGirl’s new mascara, and osing in photos with Katy Perry.

Jaden Smith 

Outside of marketing, the slow-growing gender neutral fashion movement continues to grow. Our Genreless Generation trend revealed that half of 18-33-year-olds like fashions that can be worn by either girls or guys, and more mainstream labels have been introducing genderless lines. Last month, GUESS announced the launch of His & Hers, a capsule collection of gender neutral staples. Their first-ever unisex line is focused on “celebrating confidence—no matter with which gender the wearer identifies.” The simple pieces range from denim to loungewear in muted tones to keep a “clean and neutral” appearance, as well as a few menswear inspired items like overcoats and biker jackets. CEO of GUESS?, Inc. tells WGSN Insider, “In a world that is always evolving and testing out new trends, it is important that GUESS, the global lifestyle brand, remains part of these gender-neutral movements that have been rapidly expanding and taking the fashion industry by storm.” Earlier this year, Zara introduced “Ungendered,” a gender neutral line of tee-shirts, sweats, and shorts. Refinery 29 called the line, “a huge step in the mainstream fashion space,” and “a major move for a brand with such massive global reach to step away from traditional binary offerings in a category that, historically, has been so gendered.”

Of course, gender constructs are still alive and strong, and not every mainstream brand is going to embrace the idea of blending or breaking them. But those who are making steps towards gender blurring are receiving attention and positive feedback from young consumers, who see strict gender categories as a thing of the past. 

Musical Interlude - I'm A Woman

 
Cher - I'm A Woman (with Raquel Welch) (The Cher Show, 02/16/1975)

Who Wore it Better- Gingham Skirt?

I found Krystin Lee's blog from a Pinterest link.  I kept looking at the  black / white Gingham skirt and thinking, "I have that". Sure enough, I did and it was a Talbots purchase some years ago.  I love shopping my closet.  

Note on Krystin Lee blog

Suburban Faux-Pas is a lifestyle blog where I share snippets of my current inspirations including fashion, beauty, decor and more, she looks great and has wonderful fashion advice. 

This past Saturday my Mercedes Club has a meetup at Palm Beach Gardens Mercedes, my closet dealership. Paul, the dealership manager rolled out the "Red Carpet" for some 30 club members in attendance that morning. We had free vehicle inspections / washes, a tour of all the new cars, lunch and a lively Mercedes trivia contest with prizes.  Thank you all.   

I am not going to have you tell "Who Wore It Best", because Krystin is a beautiful woman and coordinated her outfit the best. However, my skirt was shorter. I could only aspire...   

Road Star Section - Mercedes Club of America
Meetup October 2023

Feminine Differential - Wearing Retro Pin Up Styles

 

There is very little that can be considered "Retro" in menswear.  Same-old, same-old for decades. Women's fashions are so creative that new designs come out on regular time intervals; then repeat again. Some are distinctively past, however, some always look edgy or "Retro". The crinoline petticoat under a full skirt, is so 50's. However, for a costume or theme party, always appropriate; think felt poodle applique. A great female Halloween costume.     

My mother was stylish in the 1950's. A new dress for the X'mas holiday and Easter were always required with matching hat, shoes and purse.  I remember her wearing  what is now called "Carpi" pants and rolled up jeans which are now considered every day wear, not retro. Even some colors can be viewed as retro as in the above fashion layout - teal, turquoise green.  

I saw the photo below on Pinterest and was drawn to the retro color, capri jeans, heels and gingham top. I found the jeans on the Talbots site (JEGGING CROPS), on sale, already have several gingham tops and the shoes shown.  I am not seeing this as a costume, although that would work, but as a fun casual, attention getting outfit. 

Purchasing note:  The Talbots jeggings (size 6) arrived over the weekend and are super.  The overall "Retro" look, I like the outfit.  What do you think?.  Do you wear "Retro"?  There is a dress-up holiday coming!

Pin Up Girl Clothing
Mina Capris in Mint Blue Stretch Twill | Laura Byrnes Design

I Love A success Story - Teddy Quinlivan

 Openly transgender model becomes new face of Chanel

Teddy Quinlivan

Teddy Quinlivan has become the first openly transgender model to work with high end fashion titan Chanel.

US-born Quinlivan came out as trans two years ago, and had already worked with Chanel prior to the announcement in 2017. In a post on Instagram, the 25 year-old Boston native said she feared she would “never work with the iconic house of Chanel ever again” having publicly disclosed her trans identity.

Her latest campaign with Chanel sees Teddy modelling Chanel’s beauty line. The first images to emerge from the campaign feature her applying its Coco lipstick, Soleil Tan De Chanel bronzer and Le Volume De Chanel N°10 Noir mascara.

In her full announcement, Quinlivan wrote:

“I find I don’t cry anymore when things are sad, but isn’t it interesting when we shed tears in moments of triumph. This was one of those triumphant cry moments for me. My whole life has been a fight. From being bullied at school consistently, kids threatening to kill me and going into graphic detail how they were going to do it, my own father beating me and calling me a fagot, to receiving industry blowback after speaking publicly about being sexually assaulted on the job... This was a victory that made all of that shit worth it. I had walked 2 shows for Chanel while I was living in stealth (stealth meaning I hadn’t made my trans identity public yet) and when I came out I knew I’d stop working with some brands, I thought I’d never work with the iconic house of Chanel ever again. But here I am in Chanel Beauty Advertising. I am the first openly trans person to work for the house of Chanel, and I am deeply humbled and proud to represent my community. The world will kick you down, spit on you, and tell you you’re worthless. It’s your job to have the strength to stand up and push on, to keep fighting, Because if you give up then you will never experience the tears of triumph. Thank you to everyone who made this dream a reality!”

Glogal Cosmetics News 

 CHANEL APPOINTS FIRST TRANSGENDER MODEL, TEDDY QUINLIVAN

Political Week In Review 10-22-2023

 

Politico:Judge imposes gag order on Donald Trump in D.C. trial

Femininity For Me

 

TEDx - Why trans and non-binary joy is not radical

 

BY:  Ben Pechey 

Being trans is awful" according to the media, governments, certain authors and ‘charity’ groups, but it’s not trans people sharing this kind of hateful commentary. As Ben Pechey, a LGBTQIA+ advocate and writer says, all this commentary is cis-people’s problem. What if, instead, being trans can be joyful - where trans joy isn’t revolutionary, but an everyday occurance? In this powerful and personal talk, Ben describes how and why trans joy can be mundane, individual and everyday - accessible to trans and non binary people right now rather than sometime in the future. 

 Ben is a writer, presenter, content creator, LGBTQIA advocate, diversity and inclusion consultant and author. They have worked with major brands such as Manolo Blahnik, Condé Nast, Dr. Martens, the NSPCC, Virgin Atlantic and many more. They uplift and educate through media. They have had words in print and online for Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, Diva and many more. Their debut book - The Book of Non-Binary Joy - was published in May 2022. 

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

Jon Stewart Nails Arkansas AG...

 On Ban Of Gender-Affirming Care For Trans Youth

The TV host asked Leslie Rutledge why she would take a doctor's advice if her kid had cancer but ignore experts on treating gender dysphoria.

Political commentator Jon Stewart isn’t a lawyer, but he did a masterful takedown of an Arkansas law preventing gender-affirming medical care for children ― and he did it right to the face of the state’s attorney general.

Although a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 8th Circuit temporarily blocked the state from enforcing the 2021 law in August, a trial is scheduled this month on whether to permanently block the law.

But Attorney General Leslie Rutledge couldn’t put up much of a defense during an interview with Stewart for his Apple TV series, “The Problem With Jon Stewart,” based on the clip below.

A must see interview: 

Trans Bodies Are Not a Halloween Costume

By Stefani Dexaeris, Contributor Oct 29, 2015

My note: This is another way to look at getting all dress up for Halloween. Yes, ONCE my favorite holiday. However, how I dress and appear every day is no longer a costume. I make a point of not going out as Rhonda on Halloween.  Halloween was a vehicle that I used to get me to the place I inhabit today. It served a wonderful purpose to get me out among civilians and see myself as the true person I am today. The point is to "Escape" every day.  No special day required.   

____________________  

It's easy to say it's "just a costume," and at the end of the night, you can take it off. But we can't take off our transness, and we will continue having to live with the consequences of the subtle, casual hatred your costume embodies.

The days are getting shorter, the smell of pumpkin spice lattes is heavy in the air, the leaves would be changing color if this wasn't Florida and the shop windows are crawling with spooky delights. Yes, the signs are all here. Halloween is at hand!

Hands down, this is my favorite holiday of the year. Blame the nerd in me, I suppose, but I know I'm not the only one who loves the excuse to play dress-up in public without the weird stares at least once a year. It's fun to pretend to be someone, or something else for a night, and costumes run a gamut as wide as the human imagination. With such a variety of fun, frightening and even sexy ensembles to choose from, it's disappointing to see that tired stereotypes and lazy hatred still manage to find a way to the store shelves.

That's right. I'm talking about the "Call Me Caitlyn" costume. Now, it probably feels like I'm a little late to the game on this one. People have been talking about how offensive and harmful it is for at least two months, but stay with me, because I'm not going to waste your valuable time with all of the very valid points you've already heard. As a Halloween fanatic who spends months in advance perfecting my ensemble, my biggest beef with this costume is that it's entirely lazy and uninspired.

It's boring, uninteresting and completely trite.

You might find your transmisogyny witty, but trust me, you're the only one, and you're far from doing anything new. Transphobic men have been using Halloween as an excuse to dress up as a "tr*nny" since long before Caitlyn Jenner came along. As a trans woman of color, I don't get the joke. There's nothing funny about facing the realities of homelessness and employment discrimination, and losing your family and friends, and so much more just to be who you are. There's nothing funny about being treated like some kind of dangerous sexual deviant on the basis of your gender, and there's absolutely nothing funny about the prospect of being murdered just for being born different.

Maybe that's an idea though. I get it, you want to dress as a trans woman, but we know that's not funny, so why not actually put in some effort and make it scary? This is Halloween after all. You could dress as a trans murder victim. Believe me, any of us can tell you how frightening that is. This is the stuff our nightmares are made of, and with good reason. At least 23 transgender women have been murdered in the United States this year alone, and those are only the ones we know about.

Of course most people who aren't trans aren't even aware of that. Our deaths are invariably downplayed, ignored, erased and justified. You might be lucky enough to catch one or two local articles with titles like "Man Found Dead In a Dress," When a much more accurate title would be "Transgender Woman Found Dead With Multiple Gunshots to the Face," usually including some statement from the police that any potential motive is beyond the scope of their imaginations, and that the death is not being considered the result of a hate crime.

But we know better, because in every case we learn better. The signs are there plain as day. Our bodies have been found burned, mutiliated beyond recognition with knife and bullet wounds, run over multiple times and even dismembered and boiled into a stew. What's even more horrifying is that the murderers are seldom held accountable for a hate crime, or any crime at all for that matter.

Time and time again, in almost every case, we end up learning that the victim was murdered by a friend, family member or romantic partner upon coming out to them as transgender, and in almost every case, the "Trans Panic" defense uses this as a reason to justify the crime, and even coddle the murderer, as though they were somehow the real victim. Lawyers assert that finding out a woman is transgender is somehow so psychologically disturbing that murdering her is the expected and normal response, and in every state but California, it is considered a legitimate defense.

That's beyond frightening, it defies logic and sanity.

Now, obviously, I would never seriously advocate that anyone actually dress as a trans murder victim for Halloween, and I'd certainly like to hope that everyone can see how offensive and hateful that would be. So, why do we have such a hard time seeing it in the Caitlyn Jenner costume? Perhaps it's because of the way transphobia has been institutionalized in our society, and ingrained into our minds since childhood. All most people ever seem to "know" about us are myths and lies concocted to scare the public, when the reality is that we are ordinary women and men (Yes trans men do exist.) just like anyone else. Our gender is just as real and valid as yours. It's not a kink, or a choice. The only difference is our bodies, and while no one will ever be murdered for not being trans, our trans bodies will continue to make us targets, and those same trans bodies will continue to be used as an excuse for murder.

Many Halloween costumes involve fake blood. Sadly, in this case, the blood is all too real. It's easy to say it's "just a costume," and at the end of the night, you can take it off. But we can't take off our transness, and we will continue having to live with the consequences of the subtle, casual hatred your costume embodies. My hope is that with education, you'll learn to leave our bodies out of your fright-night wardrobe selection, because frankly, we're running out of blood for you to use.

__________________

Comments please...

Dylan Mulvaney - Woman of the Year

Trans influencer Dylan Mulvaney named UK mag "Attitude", first-ever ‘Woman of the Year’

Attitude magazine celebrates TikTok star who collaborated with beer maker who left her high and dry after conservatives boycotted

By Alyssa Guzman
Published Oct. 12, 2023, 

Dylan Mulvaney, the trans-identifying social-media influencer, is at it again.

From National Review: Male ‘Woman of the Year’ Complains People Don’t See Him as a Woman

Dylan Mulvaney 

After nearly single-handedly decimating Bud Light sales, Mulvaney traveled to the U.K. to be honored by Attitude magazine — which I admit I had never heard of — as its “Woman of the Year.”

“Some see me as woman of the year,” Mulvaney said in his acceptance speech. “And some people don’t see me as a woman at all.  No matter how hard I try, or what I wear, or what I say, or what surgeries I get, I will never reach an acceptable version of womanhood by those hateful people’s standards.”

Correct. Only we’re not hateful — just in touch with reality.

Clearly, Mulvaney is a troubled young man. Still, whether wittingly or not, he’s advancing a sinister and misogynistic ideology. The level of criticism he receives is in proportion to the level of attention he seeks.

Remember when we used to tell young girls that they should not seek to define themselves by others’ approval, nor by their wardrobes, and certainly not by what cosmetic surgeries they get? Remember when we tried to offer them female role models with intelligence, talent, and character who do more than satisfy a superficial obsession with appearances celebrated by pop culture?

Well, the Mulvaney method tells young women not only that appearances matter most but that — even in that realm — it’s men who make the best women. How’s that for female empowerment?

Be Forewarned - Nikki Haley

Nikki Haley kicks off campaign with hate pastor & calls for harsher anti-LGBTQ+ policy

Story by LGBTQNation 2/18/2023

Pastor John Hagee believes
 the Antichrist is gay and half-Jewish.

Former Trump administration official and South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley (R) kicked off the first rally for her new presidential campaign on Wednesday in South Carolina with an invocation by John Hagee, an evangelical pastor who opposes same-sex marriage and LGBTQ+ anti-discrimination ordinances. Hagee has also said that the Antichrist is gay, that God sent Hitler to push Jews into Israel, and that God sent Hurricane Katrina to punish New Orleans for holding a Pride parade.

The following day, while speaking at an Exeter, New Hampshire town hall, Haley said:

Florida’s 'Don’t Say Gay' law - I don’t think [it] goes far enough.”

While the law bans Kindergarten through third-grade teachers from discussing subjects related to sexual orientation and gender identity, which some say includes even mentioning LGBTQ+ people, a teacher’s same-sex partner, or a student’s LGBTQ+ parents, she compared such acknowledgment to sexual education.

At her South Carolina kickoff rally, Haley said “Pastor Hagee, I still say I want to be you when I grow up,” after he finished his invocation. The line was met with scant applause from the audience. When she served as U.S. ambassador to the United Nations under Trump, she spoke to Hagee’s group, Christians United for Israel, at its annual summit. Hagee also presented her with an award for her support of Israel.

Read More...

Haley has opposed government recognition of legally married same-sex couples, transgender participation in sports, and LGBTQ+ content in public schools.

Who is Nikki Haley? Where does she stand on LGBTQ rights?

Political Week In Review 10-16-2023

 

Sould you have expected anything different?  He is "A Florida Man". 

Challenge Yourself...

 

Robert De Niro Rips Donald Trump: He’s “Evil”

 In a speech at TNR’s Stop Trump Summit, the actor also called the former president a “wannabe tough guy with no morals or ethics.”

Robert De Niro

Tori Otten  October 11, 2023

De Niro has never shied away from condemning Trump and his actions. Over the years, he has called the former president “totally nuts,” “blatantly stupid,” and “a real racist.”

You can read De Niro’s statement in full below:

_________________

I’m sorry I couldn’t be with you today. A few days ago, I came down with a heavy case of Covid. I was looking forward to being with you, hearing the other speakers, and speaking with Miles. I first encountered Miles when he was still “Anonymous.” Through his writing, commentary, and books, I’ve come to admire his intelligence and courage. I’m grateful that he’s agreed to be my voice today.

I am with you in spirit. I am watching. This is an important conversation. What The New Republic is doing in this “Stop Trump Summit”—what you all are doing here today—can help determine our future.

I’ve spent a lot of time studying bad men. I’ve examined their characteristics, their mannerisms, the utter banality of their cruelty. Yet there’s something different about Donald Trump. When I look at him, I don’t see a bad man. Truly.

I see an evil one.

Over the years, I’ve met gangsters here and there. This guy tries to be one, but he can’t quite pull it off. There’s such a thing as “honor among thieves.” Yes, even criminals usually have a sense of right and wrong. Whether they do the right thing or not is a different story—but—they have a moral code, however warped.

Donald Trump does not. He’s a wannabe tough guy with no morals or ethics. No sense of right or wrong. No regard for anyone but himself—not the people he was supposed to lead and protect, not the people he does business with, not the people who follow him, blindly and loyally, not even the people who consider themselves his “friends.” He has contempt for all of them.

We New Yorkers got to know him over the years that he poisoned the atmosphere and littered our city with monuments to his ego. We knew first hand that this was someone who should never be considered for leadership. We tried to warn the world in 2016.

The repercussions of his turbulent presidency divided America and rattled New York City beyond imagination. Remember how we were jolted by crisis in early 2020, as a virus swept the world. We lived with Donald Trump’s bombastic behavior every day on the national stage, and we suffered as we saw our neighbors piling up in body bags.

The man who was supposed to protect this country put it in peril, because of his recklessness and impulsiveness. It was like an abusive father ruling the family by fear and violent behavior. That was the consequence of New York’s warning getting ignored. Next time, we know it will be worse.

Make no mistake: the twice-impeached, four-time indicted Donald Trump is still a fool. But we can’t let our fellow Americans write him off like one. Evil thrives in the shadow of dismissive mockery, which is why we must take the danger of Donald Trump very seriously.

So today we issue another warning. From this place where Abraham Lincoln spoke—right here in the beating heart of New York—to the rest of America:

This is our last chance.

Democracy won’t survive the return of a wannabe dictator.

And it won’t overcome evil if we are divided.

So what do we do about it? I know I’m preaching to the choir here. What we’re doing today is valuable, but we have to take today into tomorrow—take it outside these walls. We have to reach out to the half of our country who have ignored the hazards of Trump and, for whatever reason, support elevating him back into the White House. They’re not stupid, and we must not condemn them for making a stupid choice. Our future doesn’t just depend on us. It depends on them.

Let’s reach out to Trump’s followers with respect. Let’s not talk about “democracy.” “Democracy” may be our holy grail, but to others it is just a word, a concept, and in their embrace of Trump, they’ve already turned their backs on it. Let’s talk about right and wrong. Let’s talk about humanity. Let’s talk about kindness. Security for our world. Safety for our families. Decency. Let’s welcome them back. We won’t get them all, but we can get enough to end the nightmare of Trump, and fulfill the mission of this “Stop Trump Summit.”

Thank you.

The Price-Is-Right / Wrong - Off-The-Shoulder Tops

Off-The-Shoulder Tops 

I know this one is hard because you cannot feel the texture or study the quality. And, obviously the most expensive is said to be "silk" although its detail description states, "Silk blend" which can mean almost anything. What triggered this layout was the arrival of the Ralph Lauren Pre-Spring style e-mail / on-line catalog.  I assume the items would not be offered if someone was not willing to pay the price.  Would anyone notice the difference?  

   

Part of my "Price-is-Right / Wrong" games are to highlight the absurdity of female fashion.  Although not a slave to it, I do enjoy style and I am always searching for an event or evening-out outfit to be ready. The "I have noting to wear" will never be a deterrent. I just hope to live long enough to exhaust my closet. I just wish those models did not look so darn happy wearing their outfits. 

So here goes - Happy Shopping:   

 

Express - Silky Off The Shoulder Long Sleeve Tee  - $49.00 (BOGO 50% off second)

Venus - Off-The-Shoulder Top - Normally $24 on sale $14.99

Ralph Lauren - Mulberry Silk Off-the-Shoulder Sweater $790.00
          (Updated item from photo)

Traffic Stops

 

The Inevitable Will Happen 

Any of us who are out on "Escapes" know that this is a real possibility on any outing. Over the generations, all of my cars have seemed to have a "going fast" look even when sitting still. That is not to say that most of my traffic tickets were not earned.  However, it never has helped to drive a rolling target.    

One of my memorable stops was on an afternoon driving home from work on Florida's I95; "Office I  was thinking the speed limit is 95?" was not the defense I was going to try.  The State Highway Patrol officer approached the car on the passenger side and asked if I was aware of my speed.  I honestly answered "No".  His next request was a license, registration, and proof of insurance. First I handed him my driver's license, which did not fully represent how I presented that afternoon.

"IT IS ME". Seemed kind of lane but was the best and most concise explication I could come up with.  At that point, he fully studied the license and me. I said nothing further.  He asked for the other documents and then retreated to his police vehicle to verify the information and just write my ticket; I hoped. 

How I was dressed was completely legal and it was irrelevant to the stop.  I was not going to turn this into an outreach moment nor turn this into anything but a routine traffic stop.  See: How to Talk to Police When You're Pulled Over 

I watched as he got out of his car and walked back to my car.  Very professionally I was given a stern,"Let's watch our speed", along with my speeding ticket and documents.  He then told me: 

 

"Have a good day SIR."

  

OK, what is your best story?  Please share and especially share any funny or positive interactions.  Let me caution that driving while intoxicated will never have a good outcome. Just don't do it, no matter how you are dressed!

       

 

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Straight Man Dresses As A Woman - Interview

 

Published by Erika Fonseca: Sep 09, 2020

‘My girlfriend gave me an ultimatum. ‘Either that has to go, or I do.’ I broke down in tears. I tried my hardest to stop, but the desire lingered on in secret.’: Male crossdresser outed at work details journey to ‘liberation’

Sami Lawrence

Say something about your crossdressing experience: Embracing the Sami side of me has helped me love all of myself! I am out to all of my friends and family and regularly go out in femme mode just because it’s so much fun!

The real goal in all of this was just to make my crossdressing a “normal” thing for me and I have pretty much achieved that. I can do pretty much anything as a guy or a girl and I’m happy either way.

Reason you crossdress: It’s complex. In some capacity, it’s a refuge and an escape from the stresses of everyday life. It also helps me feel better and more confident about self, my body, my mind, etc.

It helps me express an appreciation for femininity that is typically suppressed for men in American culture. Also…it’s just plain fun!!

The Interview

Interview by: Sharzad Kiadeh
Straight Man Dresses Like woman

On this week's episode we have Sami, a straight man who likes to dress up like a woman! He takes us through everything from his early life growing up in a conservative and religious Florida town to what it's like for him to date. In his words he's just a "straight dude who likes to look and feel pretty."

Feminin Differential - Denim Pencil Skirt 2.0

 

Walmart - Slim Fit Rayon Knee Length Back Slit Denim Jean Pencil Skirt
Macys - CeCe Women's Printed Square-Neck Puff-Sleeve Knit Top

I have written posts on the pencil skirt and denim skirt before - Wearing A Denim Skirt After 40  and The Feminine Differential - The Pencil Skirt  I must admit that this is my favorite skirt to wear with the combination of denim and pencil cut / hemline. The BodyCon Site give this insight into the pencil skirt:

Pencil skirts are considered a timeless and classic wardrobe staple because they are so versatile and offer a flattering silhouette. The design of a classic pencil skirt is simple yet elegant, with a fitted waist and narrow hemline that falls just below the knee. This silhouette enhances your curves while also creating a streamlined and polished look. [super feminine]

Pencil skirts have stood the test of time in the fashion industry. They were first introduced in the 1950s and have remained a popular fashion item ever since. Many fashion icons, including Audrey Hepburn, Kim Kardashian and Marilyn Monroe, have donned pencil skirts, cementing their status as a classic and iconic wardrobe staple. 

Long Flare Denim Skirt

According to WikiHow the pencil skirt is good if you have curves. "If you have an hourglass figure, you should show off your curves with a pencil skirt." My petite figure does match that.  Be sure to see their other great skirt style suggestions.

So many of my denim skirts do not have the true "Pencil" look. I do have a-line and straight skirts which almost make the look, but not perfect. My latest addition is Amazon's "Floerns Women's Casual High Waist Raw Hem Bodycon Pencil Denim Skirt" - $31.99. It has a true pencil trim cut and is an elastic denim fabric that is a tight fit. A keeper.   I did not care for the raw hem so had my seamstress give it a standard hem without shortening it much. It was already above the knee. This order was for the "Blue Plain" color. I did order the sister "White" matching skirt (different description) but returned it because the quality was inferior to the original skirt.

Still not giving up on a white denim pencil skirt, I found another at Walmart online. "A2Y Women's Slim Fit Rayon Knee Length Back Slit Denim Jean Pencil Skirt White". it is $30.99 and had free shipping.  That is the skirt in the fashion layout above. 

What works best for you?  Although I do wear jeans and pants more than skirts I want to appear stylish in a skirt and the timeless pencil skirt is just that.