Definition: Sage - Wise through reflection and experience / proceeding from or characterized by wisdom, experience, and prudence.
Funny things happen on the way to life
By Janet L. Stickney
Funny things can happen as we travel about all dressed up. In my case its funny now, but tragic back then. I had rectal surgery and had the week off, so after a few days of laying around, I got all dressed up,, wearing a pleated gray skirt with a red blouse and black flats, then made my way to the mall. I bought a few things and was wandering around when a lady tapped my shoulder. I'll never forget what she said.
"Excuse me honey, but your leaking."
I ran my hand over my skirt and found blood of course. I went in the ladies to repair things, wash out my skirt and so on. The other ladies in there could see what was happening and merely smiled. Talk about passing! I got dressed and made my way to a nearby store and bought another skirt to wear home. The more I thought about it the funnier it became. Or how about the time I had a flat and was starting to change the tire when a handsome young man offered to help. Of course I let him change the tire. I even pecked him on the cheek when he was done although I positive he would have liked more.
Stay in character, do not panic, go with it if its safe, and smile. At all times we are just as vulnerable as any other woman. All the dangers they face we also face, especially in a club or bar. Drunken men do not generally use discretion real well and usually cannot hold back if they want you. Stay with other girls if you can, even the real ones. I got surrounded once in a club, the main guy decided that I was his dream girl, but with his IQ obviously only slightly higher than my cat, I declined. I quickly moved to be with a wedding party that was having an event in another room. I told one of the guys near the door what was happening and he and a few guys stepped in to help me by discouraging the guy from following me.
One of the bridesmaids recognized me from one of my television appearances and gathered me up rather quickly, and after some makeup repair, I was invited to stay. It was a fun night. Danger lurks all around us, especially if we get stupid. Dress appropriately for the venue. No ball gowns at the mall for example. Skirts, shorts or jeans are best, Use your common sense to your best ability. Dress for the occasion, not what your inner girl tells you to wear. She is almost always wrong. Look at what the majority of other women wear and use that as your guide. I will again stress that dressing your age is always the best option. There are no 45 year old teenage girls, and even if you have great legs a mini skirt might not be the best way to go.
Having a bra strap come loose or break can be tragic if you do not use good breast forms, and always double bag your birdseed breasts forms. If one breaks while you are out, well, that can be terrifying at the time but hilarious later on. I have had lost heels, had broken breast forms, and a corset stay that came loose and poked me hard. At one time, I used to fill small balloons with water, tie a string to them and drape it around my neck, giving me the look of breasts without a bra. I never gave a thought that they might break, and I was going along like it was the greatest idea since sliced bread. Then one broke and I was drenched. Thankfully I was still near home, but it drove home the idea that I needed a better balloon. Funny now, not so funny at the time. But, like all women we have to be prepared. I always make sure that I have enough money to buy new shoes, or a top or skirt because even cheap ones are better than none at all and I always carry a few bandaids just in case.
During the 65 years I have been going out as a female I learned a few things, which many like me pass on to our younger sisters. That is why the clubs are important. We have seen and experienced most all of the the errors and can help correct them before the newer girls get caught out by a stupid mistake. In today's political climate be careful where you go, be aware of your surroundings and never be afraid to call for help. They might laugh a bit, but probably not, and staying unhurt is much better than letting the neanderthals get to you. An escort to your car is always safer. I know the thought of running can be strong, but try to resist that urge and slip into a shop if you can. Call the emergency services if you are scared or threatened. Above all be safe. Go with a friend if you can, just be aware that two guys dressed as girls never ever works when you are out.
Just an old broad trying to help.
Go in Peace and Prosper
Janet, thank you so much for sharing your sage wisdom. Please, anytime.
I just finished your two-hundred-seventy-second (272) story "Sixteen" (r) on Fictionmania. Good read!