Monday, October 15, 2018

Third Person - No Diagnostics Required

In a Friend's Friday from a few weeks ago I made this statement: "Rhonda has many social interactions and does get about."  I wrote that, however spoke of Rhonda as different from myself. That is not the case, and by doing that, I relegated her to be different/less than me.    

I was speaking about myself in the third person. Here is another example spoken by Richard Nixon having just lost California’s gubernatorial election in 1962: 

You don’t have Nixon to kick around anymore because, gentlemen, this is my last press conference. 

Several weeks ago at the Southern Comfort Transgender Conference I was relating an activity to a friend and spoke of Rhonda doing "thus and so". Very quickly I was corrected and rightly so.  

"Rhonda is not a separate identity or person." She is very much who I am and this gives cause for all of us to consider our personage. I am not saying that we  always display the same personality and a good example is how we relate during a sales presentation or job interview - Not the same as we would act at a sporting event. Yet, still the same person. 

Neither are we "Sybil" in nature with multiple personality disorder. Or dissociative disorder; "characterized by an involuntary escape from reality characterized by a disconnection between thoughts, identity, consciousness and memory".  Yuck - Not me! 

Acceptance is a key factor in our transgender journey. This is one way to recognize that our own personality has a major feminine component, regardless of where we are on the transgender scale. Living as we all do, allows for different moods, activities and apparel.  No diagnostics required Dr. Freud.

Let us recognize we can be fulfilled on many levels. There is no need for the third person. I am going to make the effort to make sure that I am not relegating myself to the third person.  




  1. There are those who appear to be transgender but really it is a "performance" to present as the opposite gender... I've met a few of them and that's fine for them if that's what makes them happy.

    I also put most drag queens in that category. Appearing en femme is again, about a performance. And then they shed the persona when they are done. And there's not anything wrong with that either.

    But people who are transgender are that way, I think, because something innate connects them and identify with the opposite gender. That stays with you.

    I've always been be Janet... I knew I was transgender when I was young.... even though the word transgender didn't exist then.

    So even before I came out as trans, Janet was always who I was... even when I had a different name and was trying to get by as male.

    Does any of that make sense?

    I hope it helps.