I had much pride in my shopping skills and for my precious escape interludes, I always wanted to project the most feminine image possible. Many times that involved high heels, short skirts, and big hair. I had gone to all the trouble to get the outfit and be damned; I was going to wear it all. Anything that had carryover, was not to be considered. Slacks – no way. Flats – no way. Only the ultra-feminine. Think - Jessica Rabbit.
My role model was a caricature and impossibly represented what I wanted to become. I remember the 1988 movie “Working Girl” with Melanie Griffith and Sigourney Weaver. They had beautiful female business suits and being in business, that is what I wanted to emulate. Whenever I attended a business meeting where there were well-dressed women, I immediately had my next outfit picked out.
Undermining all of these escapes was a subtle guilt. The "I should not be doing this." feeling.
|Business Rhonda - 1988|
The term “Social Transition” is used to describe what many of us grow into. Rhonda has many friends, that know her to be transgender. I am proud of how I represent myself. If someone knows, then there is one less life sub-detail to clarify. Let us move on to more relevant issues; i.e. - Liberal or conservative? Do you watch things happen or make things happen?
I will write more on "social transition" later, however, ESCAPE also involves moving away from old constraining ideals. Age adds clarity. Self-acceptance and moving away from guilt is a transition. Self acceptance is an important step so the most important question is, “If not now, then when?"