Thursday, March 16, 2017

Jessica Rabbit and Acceptance

Jessica Rabbit 
My escapes in years past were different.  Precious hours stolen while on business trips, once a year gender conventions or a few breathless hours alone at home. We have all been there.  

I had much pride in my shopping skills and for my precious escape interludes, I always wanted to project the most feminine image possible. Many times that involved high heels, short skirts, and big hair. I had gone to all the trouble to get the outfit and be damned; I was going to wear it all.  Anything that had carryover, was not to be considered.  Slacks – no way.  Flats – no way. Only the ultra-feminine.  Think - Jessica Rabbit.  

My role model was a caricature and impossibly represented what I wanted to become.  I remember the 1988 movie “Working Girl” with Melanie Griffith and Sigourney Weaver. They had beautiful female business suits and being in business, that is what I wanted to emulate. Whenever I attended a business meeting where there were well-dressed women, I immediately had my next outfit picked out. 

Undermining all of these escapes was a subtle guilt. The "I should not be doing this." feeling. 

Business Rhonda - 1988
Fast forward and my escapes have changed or evolved. Acceptance has erased the past regrets and guilt. The pleasure now comes from within. I am not trying to emulate something that is impossible but I have accepted that I am being myself. I have grown into the person I want to be. Much like a girl growing up and becoming a woman. My goals are different. My perceptions are different. My needs are different. See me not for what I represent, but for what I am.  

The term “Social Transition” is used to describe what many of us grow into. Rhonda has many friends, that know her to be transgender. I am proud of how I represent myself. If someone knows, then there is one less life sub-detail to clarify. Let us move on to more relevant issues; i.e. - Liberal or conservative?  Do you watch things happen or make things happen? 

I will write more on "social transition" later, however, ESCAPE also involves moving away from old constraining ideals. Age adds clarity. Self-acceptance and moving away from guilt is a transition. Self acceptance is an important step so the most important question is, “If not now, then when?"   

No comments:

Post a Comment